My husband and I have been seperated for 5 months. He has not taken any steps towards recovery from his CSA or the alcoholism as a result of the CSA. He started talking about a fresh start these last two weeks - starting from this point forward. I have been very candid that he has to face his issues and be activly working a program for the alcohol abuse before we can even begin to think about trying to put things back together.

He said to me "do you really think I want to be this way?" which I guess is the closest he's ever come to admitting that he's an alcoholic. He wants to go to marriage counseling and family counseling with our sons, I agreed with reservations, I figured having a neutral third party involved would help even if we couldn't put anything back together.

I feel that he needs to take the step to getting into some program for the booze - not me set it up for him and take care of it like I always used to do. He has done nothing and this morning I started getting drunken phone calls by 11:00 am - I mean smashed drunk. He apparently slept off the worst of the day long binge and at first was nasty and confrontational with me. His last phone call he said that he needs help and he's reaching out to me for the help. I told him that he needs professional help for the alcoholism and he said that's why he's reaching out to me.

My question, confusion and concern over all of this is do I step in and help him? Do I find him a program? Do I hold his hand in this?

I've been told over and over and believe that he has to do it - do I guide him in the right direction?????? I'm so tired of it all - I know he desperately wants his family back, how much of a role do I take in helping him achieve that????

I'm afraid that he's only going to suck me dry again.

Please give me your opinions and experiances!!!!!


God has a plan for me, I trust in God's plan.