Please don't be offended or take this the wrong way...I merely wanted to share some of MY personal experiences on how decisions have been made in my Sweetie's and my relationship.

We've been married 22+ years now; but it's only been in the last couple of weeks that we've begun to deal with my childhood sexual abuse and how it has effected me (and every aspect of our marriage as well).
First off, Rosie's closest friend her entire life has been her Momma. They're incredibly close. Rosie's Momma was raped when Momma was 14, she had dropped out of school in 3rd grade to help on the family farm. Rosie's father was very verbally, emotionally and even physically abuse to Momma & Rosie (and almost as much to their 4 sons). So it's understandable that Rosie & Momma would turn to each other for emotional closeness and acceptance.
Since we met and married in South Carolina in '85, from MY viewpoint, Rosie has "left me" 4 times. The first two times were when I went back on active duty in the NAVY, and was stationed in Oakland, CA as an Instructor at the NAVAL School of Health Sciences in Oakland, CA. Each summer we were in Oakland, Rosie took Nathan and came back to South Carolina to be with her family for 2-3 months. She'd return to me then, sad to again have to be away from her Momma.
The next time that Rosie "left" me was when we were living in Jacksonville, FL. Her father needed triple bypass surgery; so she and Nathan came up here (Columbia) to be with Momma during the time around Daddy's surgery. I commuted back and forth from Jacksonville to Columbia on weekends so I could see Rosie & Nathan...but (supid me!) I never realized that my Sweetie wasn't coming back to jacksonville until she told me that she had enrolled Nathan in school in South Carolina. Duh!!

So, of course, it was up to me to take care of packing up our household stuff, finding a job back in South Carolina, and moving back here so I could be with my family again.

The 4th time that Rosie left me was in June of 2002. Her father was dying, in the last days of "ESRD" (End-Stage Renal Disease). My Sweetie, Nathan & I were living in Guam; where I had a once-in-a-lifetime job as the Materials manager for the newly opened GuamSurgiCenter. Anyway, Rosie decided that Momma needed her as Daddy was she and Nathan came back to the States. Even as dumb as I am, I knew in advance this time exactly what was going to happen. The weekend before Rosie & Nathan were going to leaver Gauam; I begged her to be honest enough with herself, me and Nathan to admit that she had no intention of returning to Guam after going back to her Momma again. She still was in denial; and Nathan was absolutely crushed. He begged and begged her to come back to Guam and not take him away from his friends, a school, church, and youth group that he loved. She wouldn't even acknowledge that her intent was to stay with Momma after being back in South Carolina. But at least me confronting her at Wendy's that Saturday gave Nathan a chance to say a teary "good-bye" to his friends. When I took them to the airport, there literally was a total solar eclipse as I drove them from our apartment to the airport (just a foreshadowing of the dark time I as about to go through alone again). Once again it was now my responsibility to pack up all our household goods, resign from my job, and arrange to move.
Well, 8 months ago Rosie's Momma moved to Bonifay, FL to live with her youngest son and his family. So -- of course -- Rosie's immediate impulse was for us to move to Bonifay to be near Momma. We're expecting to close on a house there on October 5th.

I'm sharing this in an effort to show how the LORD has honored our commitment to "...submit to one another in love..." -- no matter how hard it's been over the years. I hope that you'll be encouraged by the LORD's faithfulness!

"...for God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through Him..."

"...rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep..."

"...for the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost..."