Hello All,

I am in need of your advice. It is the Holiday season and for the last 10 years my wife and I would visit both sides of the family on Christmas. This year there is a problem that I need help on. My Brother in Law plead guilty to sexually offending his daughter. (It has ripped me apart and made me deal with my past a lot quicker than I wanted.) The wife's family is having a Family Christmas Party on the 22nd. I am not attending for two reasons: 1) I don't want to hang out with an abuser and 2) my daughter is not allowed to come because it would be a violation of the abusers probation. I don't want my wife to attend and support me and our family but she wants to celebrate it with her family. I feel that she should be with me because of my past. We have gotten into arguments over this. She is very close with her family but I feel that this is just way to close to me to let her go. Can you please let me know your thoughts?

I feel that if I through out the ultimatum that choose between her brother and myself, I feel that I would lose.