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#462792 - 03/18/14 11:11 AM GDAY
Justtroy Offline

Registered: 03/17/14
Posts: 8
Loc: australia
hi all after an hour of looking at a blank screen trying to work out what to say and how to introduce myself. i went back and read more of the introductions and all i can say is i,m so glad there is a place for us, our families and friends to talk about our past and how it has effected us and them.
i am however saddened to see there are so many of us on here and out in the world. growing up i suffer a lot of abuse from a few different people. growing up i did not relies how many people out there had gone through what i had because (we dont talk about this stuff with any one . well that is what my family told me and now at 35 i understand how stupid that statement was. i now feel and want to speak and listen to every one and hope that this will help myself and others to better heal. thank for listing ( i will post my story latter when more comfortable)

Edited by Justtroy (03/18/14 11:13 AM)

#462794 - 03/18/14 11:39 AM Re: GDAY [Re: Justtroy]
pete1973 Offline

Registered: 01/02/14
Posts: 53
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Welcome Justtroy and I can totally relate on how we didn't talk about it and although it was never said, the impression I got was because I was an 11 year old boy and it was am embarrassment that a 42 year old man molested me and manipulated me into letting him give me a blowjob, unsuccessfully as I didn't get hard and/or ejaculate but he did masturbate during and did ejaculate.
I did have a repressed memory of this finally come to light recently that he did try to get me to touch his penis too and I did fight back and totally freaked out and the overwhelming emotions buried that memory for almost 29 years so recovery or healing, however you want to look at it, does do good as I do feel good now knowing that I didn't just stand there emotionless and let him do everything.

#462802 - 03/18/14 01:11 PM Re: GDAY [Re: Justtroy]

Registered: 08/31/11
Posts: 3790

Welcome and I am sorry you have to be here. You are so right, too many people have suffered--the child, and others who are collateral damage.

Share when you feel comfortable and safe. Letting out the past is hard but once you say it over and over, you begin to realize it is not your fault.

The site offers much--read, explore or post to the discussion board, if you find chat rooms to be helpful the site has many chat room events and ad hoc chats, private messages between members can be insightful and helpful. Also explore the site for article, books and events that will help you on your journey to heal. Remember, you have to find what works best for you. We all react to the abuse differently, we all heal differently.

Best wishes and I am glad you are here.


#462806 - 03/18/14 03:10 PM Re: GDAY [Re: Justtroy]
Adam A Gedman Offline

Registered: 08/12/13
Posts: 188
Loc: Canada
Hello Justtroy,

I am sorry for your reason to be here, and as you mention, sad for having to repeat this line far too frequently, yet glad for you to have found MS.
I know that taking this step is not done easily, so I commend you for your bravery in stepping out into the light.

I've only been working on my own recovery for a little over a year and have been on this site for less than that, but can tell you that being here, speaking my truth and being supported by the MS community has had a huge impact on my overall well being.

Receiving the empathy that comes from those who understand can not be underestimated in our recovery.
I have been able to remove the cloak that contained my secret for close to 40 yrs, as a result.

Take your time, read and explore, and when you are ready, speak your truth, and experience the empathic support from those who completely understand.

I, as well as many of us, would be happy to share what has worked for us, in terms of reading material, mindfulness techniques, or meditation, or just an opinion.
Allow yourself to try things you may not have considered. Try out the tools others have used, they may work for you, if not move on, it doesn't mean anything more than that is not for you at that time.

Welcome, and take care.
Presence is the key, for all we have is now.
All we ever have is right now.

Formerly Adam A Gedman (AKA - A damAGed man)

But you can call me Kevin

Toronto Mini WoR - May 2014

#462817 - 03/18/14 09:08 PM Re: GDAY [Re: Justtroy]
Jude Offline

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1633
Loc: New England
Welcome JT,

Many of us waited years after the abuse to finally come to terms with it. You are not alone in that. Wish you well in healing and recovery.

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Sarah McLachlan

#462818 - 03/18/14 09:09 PM Re: GDAY [Re: Justtroy]
DavoSwim Offline

Registered: 02/06/13
Posts: 397
Loc: Midwest

Welcome to MS. As sad as it is that so many of us have experienced CSA, we can take comfort in the fact that MS exists and there are many,many guys willing to help each other heal. I too thought I was the only one who ever experienced this. That misguided way of thinking kept me from getting help for years. I'm glad that I've moved on from thinking like that. MS has been good for me. I'm a lot better off than I was a year ago when I first joined. Take your time and take it at your pace. It's not a race and winning doesn't mean getting their first. Winning is breaking free from our past and the lies we were told. Winning is seeing our true value. Winning is offering help to other survivors. YOu are right, listening to others and telling your story will help you and others heal. Good luck.


#462877 - 03/20/14 03:17 AM Re: GDAY [Re: Justtroy]
Mountainous Buck Offline

Registered: 12/15/09
Posts: 1631
Loc: Minnesota
Welcome Justtroy,

I hope you find healing and recovery here: you deserve to live a full life free from the past and really embracing who you were meant to be.

This is a valuable site: make use of it and the resources offered here. Welcome again!
We have to take responsibility for what we're not responsible for.

�It doesn't matter where you've come from,
It matters where you go" Frank Turner

#463670 - 04/04/14 09:34 PM Re: GDAY [Re: Justtroy]
victor-victim Offline

Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 6387
Loc: 𝒪 𝒦anada
dear justroy,

welcome to the website.
looking forward to hearing more from you on this forum.

this is a great place to help and be helped.
to heal and be healed.
to hear and be heard.

G"DAY to you too!



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