I like your poem, nltsaved, thanks for posting it.
Not knowing can be treacherous on my mind
Although I'm not a father, I also have no male figure to follow, and I ask myself this question often. You give words to the feeling nicely.
Am I doing Everything in Divine order holding it together
The best I know how?
I bet you are.
Am I failing or flourishing at this thing called Fathering
That you ask such a question, that you work to write this poem, makes me certain that you - and your kids - are flourishing. My dad and I guess (it sounds like) your dad never worried about this. I think children pick up on the unspoken caring that produced this post from you.