D - i'm no expert - but i am skeptical. from my experience - several students who had this condition - they are very unaware of relationship issues - totally clueless that there is even a problem. that definitely doesn't sound like you. thos i have known didn't seem to even want close relationships that involved emotions - almost mechanical in their ways of interacting with others - or nearly totally closed off.
take a deep breath and a giant step back from this TENTATIVE SUGGESTION. if you've got it - my guess is it is a VERY mild form. Please stop worrying until you know more.
"My experience has shown me that I all too often tend to deny that which lies behind, but as I still believe, that which is denied cannot be healed." Brennan Manning, "All is Grace - A Ragamuffin Memoir"