Hate Has Become My Nature
I hate, which is sad and pathetic.
We are meant to love and care for each other.
Yet I hate. I hate because I was betrayed.
Love becomes hate when it is abused.
The love a child feels becomes hate when misused.
Hate for other people, and worse, hate of self.
We shouldn't hate our very selves.
Now I do. When I was a child, I needed love.
I thought I had it. Someone told me they loved me.
Instead, love turned to contempt. Love was a weapon.
One I learned to use, but not on other people.
Only on myself.
Because I was unworthy of love, and unworthy to hurt others.
Not that I wanted to, except for one person.
The one who put the gun in my hand.
I couldn't even hate him. He turned my feelings against me.
So I could only hate myself.
And now I hate him and me both.
That's progress for me.