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#78852 - 04/11/06 04:54 AM Just a rant - possible triggers
FormerTexan Offline

Site Administrator

Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11927
Loc: Denver, CO
Reflecting back on life as a pre-teen, I revisited the cruelty of the world as I saw it. This is just a set of thoughts that sorta came together from that reflection. My sister intervened once during one moment of explosion from my mother. Good thing sis was there for me.


Can my peers tell if I cry?
Can they see that I am sad?
Can they hear me die inside?
Can they tell that life is bad?

Do they know my mom is mean?
Do they know my mom caused harm?
Do they know she hates her son,
That she tried to burn my arm?

Does my life at home show true?
Does my life at school agree,
That this life is one big screw,
Being driven into me?

Does this life have more than questions
Of motives sick and broken?
I'm sure open to suggestions
From those so well out-spoken.

Can others look inside me,
And see the pain in there?
Do they stop to look and see,
Yet have arrows in their stare?

(Their arrows pierce me daily
At school, the place of terror.
The teachers always fail me,
Allowing such gross error.)

Will this hell continue on,
Where only rot abounds?
Can a little grace upon
Me make a hopeful sound?

Can some goodness come my way,
A little love so dear?
(It really has, I now can say
It happened, and it's here.)



Edited by FormerTexan (02/13/08 12:54 AM)

Money talks, but all it tells me is goodbye.

If I could meet myself as a boy...

#78853 - 04/11/06 04:16 PM Re: Just a rant - possible triggers
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA

The way you end is so great - you are indeed loved here. But that's just the beginning my friend. The course of healing will really have come to fruition when you realize that you are a guy worth loving in general, that there really are women out there who would want to spend their life together with you.

Much love,

Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

#78854 - 04/12/06 05:16 AM Re: Just a rant - possible triggers
Derdlecar Offline

Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 1316
Loc: Ogden Utah, USA

If a man would get his life on track, he must first go back to the place where it was derailed.

#78855 - 04/13/06 12:51 AM Re: Just a rant - possible triggers
WalkingSouth Offline

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16269

I think this is the best one yet, and such a firm ending. Larry is correct. You really are a person worth loving. There is someone there for you.

Hugs My Friend,


"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting 'Holy Shit! What a ride!'" ~Hunter S. Thompson


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