this is a note to kick off those god forsaken blues! fuck you blues!!! get your ugly ass outta my face!
seriously - i was existing in my oh so self appointed objective self - thinking about
"oh whoa is me - " nice eh?
so self pitying for all my hurt - like - nobody else has this -
I was seriously thinking - what's the point ?
what is the point of oonecting or even trying to love someone -
when they may have all this 'blablabla agenda or what the fuck who knows"
all I know is that self pity -
now that I know I am rather a king of it!
is not so helpful - I need to make a go of it -
no other option -
what else is there too do???
two tears in a bucket! kick the bucket! -
ok - so yeah - I am looking for boyfriend -
hopefully- he will want similair thing -
i am not just into sex - cause that I can go to the b-house for -
I like cuddles and sharing - like someone - who is there to get scared with at thunder !
to laugh and make brownies with -
yeah and most of all -
someone who i know once he is sick of me -
or knows me and all my good and bad -
and me too him -
will still stick around - and me stick with him
I just want to be a man - in a relationship -
who will focus on my mate -
I guess I have a sense of what my perfect world is -
and I guess each of us does - he will too - and he will want some of that for me to give to
rightly so -
and me him - rightly so -
I bet relationships - are like that somewhat -
where some of it is shit -
I just want to love his shit too - you know?
he he - aka 'I want to say - he is a pain in the ass - and I love him'