I go to Al Anon, too, although the active alcoholics in my family are pretty distant from me these days. My mom hasn't had a drink in nearly 30 years. Alcoholism had a lot to do with the abuse I suffered, physical and sexual abuse. But there are people in meetings who openly admit that they do not have an active alcoholic in their life at the moment. If someone else's drinking affected your life (friend, parent, grandparent, abuser of your partner), no matter when they did the drinking, you should be welcome, IMHO. It's really up to you to decide if it's right for you.
I'm in Southern Maryland and found a therapist through the county health department. I originally found the health department through RAINN.org's web site.
I did an intake interview at the DC Rape Crisis Center, in part because I had followed a trail from an old Howard County newspaper article about a male survivors' group to the DC RCC. They have several groups in DC, but I'm not sure if they have one for partners. It's worth a shot, though. Check the RAINN lists
for your own county.
Check the lists of therapists here, too. If you're closer in to DC, or in No VA, there may be therapists listed with MaleSurvivor.org close by. See if one of them knows of a program for partners.