Thanks for the input everyone. We had a flare up the other day, but were able to at least come back to some equilibrium. Im not really sure what his position is about therapy. When I talked to him about it again, he told me that he was not oppsed to the idea. He is afraid that he will come all the way out here to be with me, start going to T with me only for me to wakw up and discover that our relationship is dysfunctional and start distancing myself from him. He asks me for a lot of guarantees about thigs. The fact of the matter is that I love him and am committed to this relationship. I don't really like giving guarantees, becuase I don't think anything is really guranteed, but to tell him that would speak very loudly to his insecurities.

I think that I am really approaching this phone thing the worng way. The fact is, that when I am actually on the phone with him for all that time, I don't feel like I need to get off the phone, most if the time I even lose track of the time, when it becomes an issue is when I get tired and fall asleep. I guess I need to stop blaming him for the whole phone thing and exercise some self control on my own behalf and as Cement so artfully said "GET OFF THE PHONE!" :rolleyes:

I am not trying to imply that I am the one that is all right and completely healthy and everything, becuase God knows that I have my own issues and I have had a really emotional week (found out some information about the my brother's murderer from 20 years ago and had some really painful realizations about a past relationship of my own). It has been emotionally exhausting for me and I really haven't had the most patience (aside from the fact that I am just tired...reassuring my BF each and every day and being really acutely aware of his stuff can also be exhausting sometimes....) Fact is though, that he is always willing to hear me when I am going through me stuff, so I fell really badle when I am "unavailable" (aka ZZZZzzzzz) to hear his stuff.

Peace and and light