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#62374 - 10/18/04 06:21 PM Child on the way, husband having trouble.
wifenneed Offline

Registered: 12/20/02
Posts: 96
Loc: Michigan
Hello everyone. Just found out last week we are newly pregnant, completely unplanned. My husband was great for the first few days, but I think something is hitting him hard as he has gone into his hole so to speak, after yesterday morning being very harsh with me. This is so difficult. I am an older Mom (39), and my previous pregnancies were all high risk, and now this, an unplanned pregnancy. The stress he must be feeling I know is making him shut down, and I am being supportive and giving him his space, and waiting until he can talk. He can't even speak to me.

I am beside myself with worry and fear for this situation-for him, for us, for me. We have been married for a little over 2 years. I have two girls, 7 and 5 years of age. I am scared and in need of support from my husband, who requires all of mine by having no contact, which in turn provides me with no support when he shuts down.

What a situation........ \:\(

Wifenneed....Mom to be (again)

#62375 - 10/18/04 07:22 PM Re: Child on the way, husband having trouble.
SAR Offline
Administrator Emeritus

Registered: 12/07/03
Posts: 3310
Loc: USA
wifenneed, I hope you are getting all the prenatal care you need and deserve. That does include getting yourself away from all the stress, I know it's easier said than done.

Check your PM's ;\)


#62376 - 10/18/04 10:34 PM Re: Child on the way, husband having trouble.
wifenneed Offline

Registered: 12/20/02
Posts: 96
Loc: Michigan
Hey SAR, thanks for the PM. I am just starting care, one unltrasound completed and another in a week or so. We shall see.

It is hard to get through the day, knowing that my husband has checked out on me, so to speak.

#62377 - 10/19/04 03:14 AM Re: Child on the way, husband having trouble.
Lloydy Offline
Administrator Emeritus
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 7071
Loc: England Shropshire
I've never been a father, so I might be talking rubbish ( which wouldn't be anything new :rolleyes: )

Personally I don't like big surprises, and whether that's because of my abuse I can't say with certainty. But I think it might be, I had too many 'surprises' in my life.

Also, the reason we don't have kids is because of me not wanting to have any.
Firstly I was having trouble looking after myself, looking after a child was ( I thought at the time ) out of my league.
Secondly, I didn't trust myself. I kept away from children as much as I possibly could. My suspicions were unfounded, but when I discovered that it was too late.

I hope so much that you and your husband have a wonderful new child.

Dave \:\)

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.
Henry David Thoreau


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