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#62366 - 10/05/01 02:42 PM Therapy question for Survivors
lovemyhusband Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 09/19/01
Posts: 23
I have been checking into support groups in my area for my husband. The problem is that there are not any solely for men and the other groups, while they encourage men to come, have very few male members. Would this deter any of you from going to group therapy? Thank you, LMH

#62367 - 10/05/01 05:22 PM Re: Therapy question for Survivors
Just Call me J Offline

Registered: 07/14/01
Posts: 204
Loc: Inland Empire, California
Has your husband expressed interest in going out to group therapy?

My honest answer is that I don't know that I'm comfortable yet with talking to a large group of people about it, in "real life". My talks so far has been one-on-one with my closest friends, and done somewhat anonymously, here.

For me, it's a bigger issue of being truly OUT with my abuse. Once I get over that hurdle, then I could face the issue of the gender breakdown of the group. I'm not there yet.

So I find myself wondering why I chose to respond to your post, if I didn't answer your question. I guess it's just more stuff to consider for you (as if you didn't have enough already).

I hope you found something useful in this. That's really cool that you're doing the legwork for your husband. I hope that he appreciates all that you are doing for him.

We're in this together.


We're in this together. - Nine Inch Nails

#62368 - 10/05/01 05:59 PM Re: Therapy question for Survivors
babs Offline

Registered: 07/20/01
Posts: 59
Loc: Cub Hill, MD

Lack of male support groups seems to be a nationwide problem. You might try to contact the Sidran Foundation and they may be able to provide a list of organizations in your area.
Another route is to find a therapist who deals with SA and would probably be aware of local activities.

Even though my husband has been in therapy for most of the last year and at one point seemed DESPARATE to meet another survivor he has not been ready to deal with a group situation. I think the thought of opening up to a room full of people would threaten his feelings of SAFETY. Talking to his therapist is difficult enough for now.

Glad to see you return to this forum.


#62369 - 10/05/01 06:16 PM Re: Therapy question for Survivors
lovemyhusband Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 09/19/01
Posts: 23
Thank you Jeremy and Babs for your posts. I met with a wonderful woman that was so helpful and informative. She spoke about group therapy but I too believe that individual therapy would be best to start. I am so surprised at the lack of male support out here. Glad to be back, I feel like I have friends here. LMH

#62370 - 10/08/01 01:26 PM Re: Therapy question for Survivors
SoCalJohn Offline

Registered: 05/18/01
Posts: 510
Loc: Los Angeles, California

I wish you well in your efforts to find a group for him, the closest i ever came to finding one was being in a mens support group that was for general mens issues and not focused on abuse.

I had one therapist in the past that i worked with one on one about my abuse issues that put together a group for male survivors based on her cients and the clients of other therapists she knew, it worked out pretty good for me.

Aside from the therapist setting one up i have never found a group for just guys that focused on abuse stuff.

I have been in mixed groups several times and yeah, there are a few things everyone has to adjust too, all male would be nice, i am beginning to wonder if they even exist.


I asked him about this law he spoke of, he said,,, *watch* he then asked the others to share about their lives,,, the others talked of how things were for them, how things worked in their lives,,, and as they believed, it was so.


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