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#62232 - 08/24/01 10:42 AM Need some advice please

I was sexually abused as a child by my cousin, and kept it repressed for many years. (I am now 27) In my current relationship, I was abusive towards my girlfriend and not very considerate of her until i admitted to her my history of SA. Now we are still together but she says that she harbors some angry feelings towards me for abusing her. i know that it was wrong and have been doing tremendously better for some months now, but what can I do to help her feel secure in me getting healthier. We both want to spend our lives together, and this is the one hurdle that we have to get over. Please help us. Thanks so much.

#62233 - 08/28/01 07:50 AM Re: Need some advice please
getteddie Offline

Registered: 07/19/01
Posts: 226
Loc: Cub Hill, Md
That's an easy one!!!! If you want to have it work out you have to get a therapist to see you at least once a week and get your girl to see the same one or a different one once a week...the you both go together to a therapist at least once every three weeks! You are hurt worst then you know and you have hurt her! If you go all out and do this you have a good chance but don't do it and you have a 90% chance of breaking up and a 95% chance of flipping out later anyway and having to go to therapy. Good luck!!!


#62234 - 08/30/01 04:10 PM Re: Need some advice please

I agree. You go get therapy alone and you two go together. You;ll have issues to work on together. YOu see at this place that there;s lots of guys who lose their wives or girlfriends and then want them back later (like me). You can work with your girlfriend and she can help you and you help her, there;s nothing wrong with leaning on someone. There;s no use for her to feel angry for you forever for what you did so go to couples therapy together and work it out together.


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