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#530085 - 12/21/18 12:51 PM X)
tommyb Offline


Registered: 11/29/10
Posts: 985
Loc: American South
(a chapter)

__________


(Saturday, 24NOV2018)


'Friends were in town. Some off the grid. They had one amongst them who needed to sleep on my couch. 'Didn't mind.

Upon parking his bike and dropping his hiker's backpack and gear, he looked around the apartment, then centered toward the television. "Dude," he says, as he turns his expression back towards me. "You don't have a game system?"

Blue-eyed with curly-blonde hair, twenty-two years of age, a-little-too-skinny, with a maybe-learned countenance of super-friendliness, as if being proudly off-the-grid had made him more grateful toward kindness, he went to take a shower and change clothes.

Opening the large wooden chest at the end of the bed, 'made up the couch with extra linen and blankets, including a folded stack nearby. 'Then 'minced garlic and chopped onion and placed them in warming olive oil in a cast-iron skillet, having no other ideas for supper.

While making risotto from plain white rice, then adding the-good parmesean and the-good black pepper, plus a little milk as cheat, he sits in a wooden chair adjacent to the kitchen and tells his life story. At first it remains a series of adventures and mishaps, while traveling by foot and by-hitchhiking across huge swaths of the American northeast, midwest, and Montana. Then he tells it a second time, more bluntly, with self-effacing deadpans along the way. The he retells it, where everything he did was wrong, and his relatives and friends could do no wrong.

"'Have a neighbor with a PS3 he never uses," 'tell him.

"Is there a GameStop near here?"

'Next morning, cold settles over the mountains, intending the same winter storm that had me concerned concerning him in the first place.

'Should have seen it the night before when we thought to get provisions from the grocery. 'Used to work there, so some are familiar, but mostly 'notice the private expressions that occur, like they're kindly relieved to see a normal dude who seems to do most of the talking, in this bright-eyed, grinning way he has. 'Usually I shop here alone. 'Forgot it was Thanksgiving two days ago.

On the bus the next morning, 'run into known-for-years-neighbors, previous co-workers, and people from groups. The neighbors are formal and official in their socializing, as if pleased with the Jane-Austen-ness of it, while the co-workers have a strong-joking demeanor, reminescent of the bonds formed in hot kitchens during rush-hours, and the trust when sharing heavy labor.

He sits alone on the back row, me perpendicular to him, watching all of us, keeping himself out of it, but for one curious expression, occuring when a Vietnam-era poet-from-my-building reaches out her hand to squeeze mine, as if with knowing, while never bringing up poetry.

At GameStop most games tend to be around seven dollars. He knows everything. I know nothing. He's like a kid in a candy shop.

Next door at the general store, lots of customers know me, while he stays silent, and I do say, "It's been too long..." alot.

Co-workers happen by with confident purpose and glad smiles, usually with something funny to say, playing into whatever dynamics we have, then begin their bard's-like spiel. 'Swear general store workers wouldn't get along so well if there wasn't such constant, intense drama.

Back on the bus, toward the apartment, he seems like he wants to say something.

'Turned away as we sit across from each other, 'having noticed the lack of critiques. There were no policemen or firefighters, giving that look like they want to keep out of my space, while unable to hide a look of astonished pride. There were no guys-my-age randonly aggressively spitting out a self-satisfied critique. It never matters until that moment of small-town-life where you run into them again, when they suddenly have a look of haughty offense, seemingly having accidentally vetted themselves in front of friends and acquaintances, in some way that's somehow my fought. Most are kind, merely wanting me to know they're a ... fan(?).

'Tried to explain once: he responded, "You sure it's not all in your head?" So maybe we're not friends; he was a guy my age, maybe single. Meanwhile, if he can't imagine being a somewhat-known poet in Carolina, there's no explaining it to him. Supppose he was a social worker. Maybe it was tied to his job.

Things were once more blunt: An univited exchange with a co-worker concerning the poetry, or as they call it, the novel, on average goes like this:

"Why don't you just publish it?"

"How do you know I know what you're talking about..."

"Why don't you rewrite it so it's written to us instead of them?"

This is usually returned with a look of astoundment.

"I just don't f_cking get it."

'Stop watching the road, and look toward him, as if checking on him.

"People really like you," he says.

He looks at me smiling and genuine, then turns his head away, as if secretly happy for me, maybe recognizing no one had ever said that to me before. He then turns his features back towards me with anticipation, the snow beginning outside the windows behind him, mountains moving by. He cocks an eyebrow with that same incredulousness as Dakota.

"Dude," he says, with a slight shake of his head. "Where do you go?"

__________




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#530104 - 12/22/18 01:13 PM Re: X) [Re: tommyb]
tommyb Offline


Registered: 11/29/10
Posts: 985
Loc: American South
__________

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#530105 - 12/22/18 01:13 PM Re: X) [Re: tommyb]
tommyb Offline


Registered: 11/29/10
Posts: 985
Loc: American South
__________


(Saturday, 22DEC2018)


(afternoon)


... the humility of learning land ... 'Can't imagine more human dignity ... being so grounded. Land, outposts, ports, vantage points. Did the Middle East happen only yesterday ... 'Only takes eighteen years for a male or female humanoid born upon the earth to sponge the last five billion, yet where's Kissinger to school a president ... 'Middle East's about strictness, yo ... Who is the stricter ... Muslims, Jews, Sea Peoples, otherwise known as Philistines, otherwise known as Palestinians. Militant strictness. You know ... them ... Jews ... the beginnings and walking seeds of Western Civilization ... When we stepped away from Africa we were not wandering the desert forever. 'Bout quality, yo, when building an economy. Work don't play.

... the largest population of Israelis remain in Israel. The second largest population of Israelis remain in Iran. The space between them ... Syria, Iraq. Upon Obama pulling out of Iraq, Al Qaeda resurges as ISIS, then moves into Syria. 'Such has been going on since the beginning.

... Land, outposts, ports, vantage points ... 'Best on earth's Afghanistan, yo ... Alexander the Great himself couldn't take it. 'Best training ground for soldiers in the world ... Ours ... Or theirs.

'Get why soldiers can go off the grid so easily. The civilian world remains seen-right-through. In all its hypocrisy.

__________


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#530112 - 12/22/18 03:51 PM Re: X) [Re: tommyb]
tommyb Offline


Registered: 11/29/10
Posts: 985
Loc: American South
__________

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#530165 - 12/24/18 09:32 PM Re: X) [Re: tommyb]
tommyb Offline


Registered: 11/29/10
Posts: 985
Loc: American South
__________


(Monday, 24DEC2018)


'Don't know which is more important: sobriety or understanding.

Last night, 'emotions did the deed. 'Thought to sleep early. Four beers down. 'Asleep by seven.

'Waking at one two three, four, what effortless meditation. Unfair. Those who take on the most 'can learn a survivor's habit.

To lie to sleep. To witness the mind. 'Allow the clockwork of no escape with humble humanitity. Then no opiate to pay later.

Is there a sterness to life ... When young, youth frees one of individual habits, the truth asserts itself into the present moment. The rest is shaken off.

'Having found out some trick to substances is humbling. But to know. To know what's going on with one's self.

__________



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#530166 - 12/24/18 09:50 PM Re: X) [Re: tommyb]
tommyb Offline


Registered: 11/29/10
Posts: 985
Loc: American South
__________

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#530167 - 12/24/18 10:21 PM Re: X) [Re: tommyb]
Tom E. Offline


Registered: 01/08/17
Posts: 666
Loc: FL
outstanding... whew

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#530574 - 01/09/19 06:56 PM Re: X) [Re: tommyb]
tommyb Offline


Registered: 11/29/10
Posts: 985
Loc: American South
_____________




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#530609 - 01/10/19 07:44 PM Re: X) [Re: tommyb]
tommyb Offline


Registered: 11/29/10
Posts: 985
Loc: American South
__________


(Thursday, 10JAN2019)


(dusk)


Is there a butterfly effect ...

Does everything ripple as if water ...

'To think, the learned, the trusted, the priest, offering the sacrifice, then killing, handling the butchery, then directing, ensuring no food bourne illness, back when the words 'food bourne illness' don't exist.

What's sown's reaped ...

Landscape. 'National Emergency up here, apparently ... 'cept it's 'cause of elsewhere. Once, Africa and South America were quite close. Now the north's the closer.

How things change.

__________



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