A simple definition of a complex interaction goes like this:

A trauma bond is made when someone uses fear, excitement, sexual feelings or sexual physiology to entangle another person.

When I think of what so many people have gone through, this picture of entanglement seems accurate. Now that I am more attuned to this possibility, it strikes me very deeply and painfully when I see how I have adapted to these dynamics.

For instance, one of the people who has been very supportive of me is my stepmother, who is also a therapist. Unfortunately, she is also the daughter of a convicted pedophile. Every once in a while she lapses into a dynamic that reflects the above definition. She acts in ways with me that are confusing. I shut down and go along with it, and then feel a little weird and dissociative afterwards. I'm trying to catch this more but it is very difficult, as it probably came into being during my adolescence.

Would love to hear from anyone on the subject....

Lose the drama; life is a poem.