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#461741 - 02/28/14 09:56 PM Faith Lost through the Sin of Perpetrators, Found
SamV Offline

Registered: 12/13/09
Posts: 5971
Loc: Sunnny, South East USA
Faith, according to Hebrews 11:1, is the "assured expectation of thing hoped for, the evident demonstration of realities though not beheld". Faith, such belief in the promise of perfection, everlasting life in peace and prosperity that the holder of such faith considers the knowledge of the coming event as having already happened. John wrote in this fashion, in Revelation 1:10 where he states he had come into the Lord's day. All throughout the book of Revelation he uses past, present and future articles to convey the message of hope.

The difference for me personally is that my faith was not founded on an incredible journey for years in my adulthood with an amazing teacher, wonderful works and a ripe old age to fondly consider the epic experience that was and is Jesus Christ. I was abused, beaten and cast out by those who claimed to be of the faithful. I did not learn faith through example. I cannot read about those who had faith and managed amazing things in furthering the good news, I feel inadequate and fear that if I were in a situation that called for faith, I would fail. What would I be today if those who professed to be Christians truly were? The abuser, supporting and nurturing. The parents, teaching patience, confidence through allowing me to work through situations but never letting me be destroyed, my siblings, connected, accepting, forgiving. Who would I be? The apostle Paul felt that way, Romans 7:13-24 finds Paul struggling with the flesh and the spirit, the "good" he wishes to do and the "bad" that is present within him. I too have that war, I am not stalwart in faith, as was Moses when he told Jehovah God that he be excused from the task of freeing God's chosen people. Still, Moses went up. He did what God asked and was a means of relief for the righteous.

How do I find such faith? Through study? Studying the Bible creates fear of failure and rejection. It was only in May of 2009 that I fully accepted I was going to be included in the blessings of the righteous. Now I find myself fearful of losing that blessing, such a conundrum. I cannot study fast enough to overcome that fear, when I challenge that fear, the spiritual joy I feel in what I can do is quickly consumed. I have found it easy to fall asleep to an audio file narrating the Bible. What do I retain? Very little. Everyone around me wants me to succeed, well, the important ones anyway. I do not want to disappoint them, but I do not want to rush in an emotionally overwhelming situation and overreact. I could not face another person who ever had shock and surprise on the face from me acting out. To reach out and make that mistake is too much, it is not worth it to try for that goal with that risk. It is too much.

The perps in my life are out of the picture, the recovery complete in my heart. My day to day life is calm and content, the menial tasks are confronted and subdued. Faith eludes me, the motivation it gives those to reach out, challenge themselves and actually become a believer or to give more of themselves and their resources to a spiritual lifestyle.


Hebrews 11:1 still warmly invite me to try. In fact, Hebrews 11 has many great examples of those faithful acts that are carefully and lovingly written down for my encouragement. Enoch, Noah, Abraham and Sarah, Rahab, Samuel.., the list goes on. Rahab, interesting in that while she was not an Israelite, her heart, her faith in the words she had only heard in whispers and in the fearful talk of others embolden her to act to save the two spies, sparing her life and those who would listen to her. In these examples I can remember, I can let these cover my heart, healing the holes of betrayal and destruction. In the definition of faith I can see with my heart's eye and ruminate on the comfort of being in the center of God's people, glad to be instructed in His Ways and walking in His Steps. Even though the fear is rising in me, the recovery tells me I will work through it. Even though I am tired of the anxiety, I will again challenge myself to reach out, to grab hold of the glorious freedom of my Merciful God and His Wisdom. In His Wisdom, He gave us faith. There is no other word like it, f-a-i-t-h, defined as "a confidence or trust". Logically, I must offer that I trust, I have confidence in Word of God being fulfilled. Is it that easy? Is that the statement that can help me? If faith is confidence, I have confidence, but I do not trust. In confidence, I can learn to trust.

In trusting, I can find faith.
MaleSurvivor Moderator Emeritus 2012 - 2014

#461748 - 02/28/14 11:42 PM Re: Faith Lost through the Sin of Perpetrators, Found [Re: SamV]
victor-victim Offline

Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 6387
Loc: 𝒪 𝒦anada

good stuff in hebrews 11.

Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see. This is what the ancients were commended for.
By faith we understand that the universe was formed at Gods command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.

All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance, admitting that they were foreigners and strangers on earth.

The world was not worthy of them.

These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised, since God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.

there is some heavy stuff in there as well.
very heavy.

your mention of Romans 7:13-24 just happens to include one of my favourite faith scriptures written by paul. i refer to this passage quite often.
i can really identify with the apostle here.

Did that which is good, then, become death to me? By no means! Nevertheless, in order that sin might be recognized as sin, it used what is good to bring about my death, so that through the commandment sin might become utterly sinful.

We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to dothis I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in Gods law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?

his audacious honesty testifies to his credibility.


#468759 - 08/10/14 09:52 PM Re: Faith Lost through the Sin of Perpetrators, Found [Re: SamV]
BuffaloCO Offline

Registered: 07/14/12
Posts: 490
Check out Psalm 91: 14-16

14 Because he loves me, says the LORD, I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. 15 He will call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. 16 With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation. NIV Student Bible

No matter who or what slams me in the natural, my strength comes from the supernatural, from knowing not only who I am now but whose I am as well.
�We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark. The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.� - Plato

#468761 - 08/10/14 10:25 PM Re: Faith Lost through the Sin of Perpetrators, Found [Re: SamV]
victor-victim Offline

Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 6387
Loc: 𝒪 𝒦anada
Originally Posted By: BuffaloCO
my strength comes from the supernatural, from knowing not only who I am now but whose I am as well.

pure GOLD.



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