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#466789 - 06/19/14 12:50 PM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: tbkkfile]
sentry Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 08/11/12
Posts: 58
Loc: Canada
Hey Husky. I don't want to come across like I have the right answer in your situation with your parents. I was triggered immensely and was instantly back in my bedroom with my foster mother screaming at me in the doorway. I had failed to get up to start her car for her and I woke up to her screaming at me. When I stood up she fired her keys at me hitting me in the head. I picked them up and was going to throw them back at her. The anger inside me was frightening. I really felt at the time I could have killed her. It was not over the incident at the time but built up after years of violence and abuse she perpetrated on me and my sister. I walked up to her and grabbed her wrists and backed her out and across the hall and into the closet and shut the door. I am so grateful I did not go any further, but the anger that had built up in me after years of her hate and cruelty was right there at the surface. I can feel it now talking about it.
May I suggest to you Husky as a fellow survivor that you get yourself some support now. This is too big for you my friend. You need outside professional support to intervene in the situation on your behalf.
Please forgive me If I have gone to far but I have been there and it registered so clearly with me. I stayed away from my foster mother as much as I could after that incident. It was the first time I defended myself and stood up for myself and quite frankly it scared the shit out of me.
Take Care of yourself Husky. It is time for you to put your safety first.
Sentry.

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#466793 - 06/19/14 02:40 PM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: concerned_husky]
concerned_husky Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/29/12
Posts: 766
.


Edited by concerned_husky (08/31/15 11:47 AM)
Edit Reason: Walls up again.
_________________________
Husky

"Only the solitary seek the truth, and they break with all those who don't love it sufficiently." - Pasternak

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#466794 - 06/19/14 03:04 PM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: concerned_husky]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3950
Loc: settling in the USA again
Husky -

i don't want to come across as nagging - because i know that you have heard this before - but - this just really underscores the importance of you getting the hell out of there as soon as you possibly can. whatever you can do to make that happen, it should be your number one priority, IMHO!

be careful and take care of yourself,
LEE
_________________________
"the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues it can begin to feel commonplace and eventually acceptable."
- Alan Cumming, "Not My Father's Son"

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#466816 - 06/20/14 12:34 AM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: concerned_husky]
Bluedogone Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/03/13
Posts: 798
Loc: Southern US
((((((Husky))))))

It's been a few hours since the "blow up" and I hope things have settled down a bit and you feel more in control of how you're coping. I know in my own situation getting away from parents was like a whole new life of freedom. Obviously, I don't know your personal situation, but sometimes family relationships are just too toxic to try to deal with. Parents can cause such pain and heart ache. I wish I had some great advice to offer, but I don't, I can only say my thoughts are with you in this difficult, difficult situation.

CJ
_________________________
Never, never, never, never give up...Winston Churchill

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#466821 - 06/20/14 07:31 AM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: concerned_husky]
Sven Offline


Registered: 07/29/13
Posts: 485
How are you doing Husky?
_________________________
The first step to living the life you want, is to leave behind what you don't want.

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#466822 - 06/20/14 08:19 AM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: concerned_husky]
concerned_husky Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/29/12
Posts: 766
.


Edited by concerned_husky (08/31/15 11:48 AM)
Edit Reason: Walls up again.
_________________________
Husky

"Only the solitary seek the truth, and they break with all those who don't love it sufficiently." - Pasternak

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#466823 - 06/20/14 08:44 AM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: concerned_husky]
tbkkfile Offline


Registered: 09/16/13
Posts: 349
Loc: Surrey, United Kingdom
Hi Husky, I'm so glad that you've taken a positive step forward, it's the first stage in reaching a better place and we're with you all the way, you don't have to do this on your own.

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#466824 - 06/20/14 09:01 AM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: concerned_husky]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3950
Loc: settling in the USA again
Husky - two weeks - that is good to hear. you can do that. you will do so much better once you are in a less sick and toxic atmosphere. hold on and be cool - a better time and place is within reach.
lee
_________________________
"the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues it can begin to feel commonplace and eventually acceptable."
- Alan Cumming, "Not My Father's Son"

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#466840 - 06/20/14 06:40 PM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: concerned_husky]
WriterKeith Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/10
Posts: 980
Loc: California
You've got a worldwide group standing with you here through the hard times, Husky.

Keep reminding yourself that this is not a permanent situation.
_________________________
I have taken to the stand-up comedy stage to educate other male survivors and those who try to love them. I blog about my isolated religious upbringing where physical and sexual abuse were commonplace and I serve as a facilitator of a weekly support group for men who have suffered sexual assault.

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#466903 - 06/22/14 09:54 PM Re: I Just Blew Up... [Re: concerned_husky]
focusedbody Offline


Registered: 02/03/13
Posts: 489
Loc: NY
Husky:

Do you think you could share your plan for leaving? I think it would be good to go over it with supporters and survivors here.

FB
_________________________
Lose the drama; life is a poem.

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