I haven't gone on here in a while. But when I read your statement, it moved me and I wanted to reach out. Hence, the reason for this posting.
I am hoping that you are doing better than when you first posted this. Your remarks sounded eerily familiar. I hope that if you get this you are able to connect with me. I do not know if you can leave tel number or not, but I am willing to share.
To let you know about me, I am 54, I am married, I have two adult children. I use to work as a community based dually diagnosed Sex Offender Specialist. Not a job that I relished because it kicked up my past as a child being molested and as an adult when I was raped. I've had good counseling and a wonderful family to help me seek out healthy choices in my life. If you find that you'd like to contact me, please be assured that I as willing to help. I will say that there appears to be great therapists here, but if you haven't found one you are comfortable with, either here or where you are located at, I stand ready to be there for you. Warm and sincerest regards, Bill
Forgiving does not always mean everything goes back to the way it was. There are still natural consequences for what was done.