Tonight I got on Google to get a feel for other wives perspectives on husband survivors (those outside of MS) as I will freely admit that I will likely overlook the impact of the healing from CSA journey has had on my wife. I talk to my wife and try to connect, and I know she sometimes she holds back because she is worried about hurting me. So I searched to find info on other partners experiences in their own words.
And then I came across this post, and would ask that you either don't read it, or read all of it: http://www.allaboutcounseling.com/forum/general-support/my-husband-was-sexually-abused-as-a-child/
In my opinion, the survivor was doing everything right, being a good parent if not prone to mistakes like we all are. What disturbs me is the responses this woman received and its truly rattled me. A few highlights - keeping in mind that this is a site on counseling. A few gems:
"It is sad that some people become abusers after being victims. They talk about how they were "raped" as children, when in fact, they usually participating willingly to gain acceptance and love. I suppose saying one was raped makes it easier to talk about."
"This man is NOT normal. His words are NOT reliable because he is damaged goods"
Having been repeatedly raped as a child, I tend to really overreact to things, but I am really disgusted by the comments of the witch hunting bitch who is advising this woman to leave without having any information but trust your gut. Is my personal bias getting in my way because I think the fellow survivor, the subject of this post, really did the right thing?
Ignorance like this makes me want to be a hermit.