Newest Members
twinker, LaneFiasco95, Kristabar, tom93, ninjei
13513 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
bcb00 (41), beginning (37), Gary H. (44), jewelmom (66), kdg2310 (58), Li Yuki (2017), monarchnaps (39), Neverquit (33), Nord (61), SoSad (48)
Who's Online
4 registered (betrayed boy, learning2remember, Max1969, Chris4TheMill), 74 Guests and 3 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
13,513 Registered Members
75 Forums
70,197 Topics
490,132 Posts

Most users ever online: 418 @ 07/02/12 11:29 AM
Page 2 of 2 < 1 2
Topic Options
#450661 - 10/19/13 10:16 PM Re: Everything I wanted to know (but am afraid to ask) [Re: SoccerStar]
HD001 Offline

Registered: 07/30/12
Posts: 276
Loc: us
I second what sugarbaby said! If my H asked me that it wouldn't bother me. Chances are your wife has probably thought about how your story played out and visualized in her mind to an extent. I know I have thought about what my H has been through.
It doesn't make me think he has less worth either. Not in the least. It just makes me wish I could scoop him up and hug him. Just like a lot of the other women on here.
Everything comes from within

#451001 - 10/22/13 09:02 PM Re: Everything I wanted to know (but am afraid to ask) [Re: SoccerStar]
Valkyrie Offline

Registered: 04/27/12
Posts: 167
I'm not sure that looking at a person in the immediate aftermath of a crime, traumatic event, and a tragic loss is a fair time frame for this question or even the right one. What one does after that seems to be the better time frame to examine.

My H was 8 years old when when his abuse began and he survived in the best way he knew how. He has come dangerously close to ending his life over this and developed some other awful coping mechanisms, but he has managed to survive for 30 years now. More over, he succeeds in everything he sets out to do, so now that he is working on giving up those bad coping skills, and is working on integrating all the little compartments in his head, I have no doubt he will accomplish that as well.

I would never even think to consider that time immediately after. He was a defenseless child trying to survive. His survival hasn't always been pretty. It's been pretty damn heartbreaking, truth be told, but he is the strongest person I know, and that strength is one of the many, many, many reasons I fell in love with him.

I grieve for the child whose life was irrevocably changed, but I marvel at the man that child became.

Edited by Valkyrie (10/22/13 09:03 PM)

#451821 - 10/30/13 12:44 PM Re: Everything I wanted to know (but am afraid to ask) [Re: GoodHope]
L84 Offline

Registered: 11/17/12
Posts: 35
Loc: USA

Thank you! I really needed that today. smile


Page 2 of 2 < 1 2

Moderator:  ModTeam, peroperic2009 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.