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#450389 - 10/16/13 11:12 PM My topic for H.C. Tonight.
Vedder32 Offline

Registered: 03/09/13
Posts: 23
Loc: Kentucky,U..S.A
Hello Brothers.

As all of you know I come and go and participate when I can and receive a lot of enjoyment and healing from our conversations and growing relationships. However, I am still in an infant stage of learning how to adapt and live in terms of my recovery.

I wish to share with you what has taken place in the last 24 hours of my life and what I should do to resolve and overcome this scenario by using healthy logic reasoning.

Yesterday was a very busy day and can honestly be summed up as a "cross road day". I had two medical appointments; one with my Therapist and one for my meds.

The appointment with my "T" was very productive and positive and it's safe to say I am growing in terms of my relationships all across the board. The appointment with my Doctor was also productive. I discussed with confidence about my medical handicap at the moment ( my back) and how we're going to develop a plan to be on the path of healing.

However, when I got home. my life erupted with very negative actions and feelings. The police were in my neighborhood and they were searching for a certain individual and was doing so with haste and questioning everyone.

After the police departed, I spoke with my neighbors in a very calm and rational way, and came too an understanding of why the police was searching for this individual. Apparently he had committed a parole violation but it's also rumored his criminal record had been cleared ( for reasons unknown)of child molestation !!!

It's very safe to say I was outraged by the information received and it has placed a cloudy sky over my head for several reasons.

Number 1. My past and being a survivor of very harsh sexual abuse.
Number 2. Seeking reassurance that such accusations were false and being informed that they were made me feel very angry, betrayed, and having no respect for the justice system.
Number 3. I knew of the guy and told him and sum him up as an "odd ball". I just couldn't place my finger on it.
Number 4. Questioning myself and seeking assistance to discuss this issue with my brothers in male survivor and if I should schedule an emergency appointment with my "therapist.

So brothers, I ask of you. How would you feel if this trauma came upon you? Is it a sign of weakness if I schedule an emergency appointment with my therapist? Last but not least, how can I retain my daily peace and progression?

I bring this up because it came upon me really strong that we're not fully going to recovery unless some form of justice, unification and solace is too take place in our individual lives and relationship as brothers.

#450412 - 10/17/13 01:50 AM Re: My topic for H.C. Tonight. [Re: Vedder32]
Jacob S Offline

Registered: 01/01/13
Posts: 687
Loc: where the shadows lie
It is never a sign of weakness to seek help when you need it. Strength is about the ability to get done what needs to get done. Doing it alone is not a requirement. You need to take care of yourself.

Justice is great when it can occur. Sometimes it just won't happen, but when there is a chance that it could it is worth going after.
I am a veteran of the soul wars.

#450430 - 10/17/13 03:37 AM Re: My topic for H.C. Tonight. [Re: Vedder32]
Jude Offline

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1633
Loc: New England
Originally Posted By: Vedder32
So brothers, I ask of you. How would you feel if this trauma came upon you? Is it a sign of weakness if I schedule an emergency appointment with my therapist? Last but not least, how can I retain my daily peace and progression?
Hey Vedder,

I have had similar experiences with CSA cases in the news in my area where justice had not been done. Although I didn't know either the perp or the victims, I still took it personally....too personally. I was bouncing off the walls. In a way, it makes sense that we would react this way to such situations, but its just not healthy for us. I have learned to be on the look out for those things that set me off, and steer clear of them, or at least prepare myself for what NOT to do. Reach out for help? Hell yeah! Whats the point of a support system if we don't use it. Call your T, or PM one of us. You don't need to do this alone. And don't make this a crisis if you don't have to. I prefer to think of such things as a "bump in the road": it shakes me up, but I keep driving.

Be well,

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Sarah McLachlan


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