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#448151 - 09/25/13 05:54 AM Filling in psychic gaps
justplainme Offline

Registered: 09/01/09
Posts: 472
Have any of you found that whenever you experience new emotions or new ways of perceiving yourself that you suddenly project onto another your emotion or sense of ownership of that feeling or cognition.
I think to myself, wow im going to go hang out with this girl and gonna really have fun.
And suddenly an unconscious image of some other man i know, who in my unconscious is more capable of having fun with that girl pops into my mind, its as if my ego or unconscious is thinking to itself you dont have the inner resource to have fun with a girl, only this man can, or you have to be an imitation of him in order to do it.
But then i realize and remember that everything the psyche lacks within it tries to look for outside in order to patch the hole inside. Like they say,...nature abhors a void.
I realized this not long i've been getting much better.
I can catch myself doing this.. and i say to myself, BULLSHIT! you don't need to be like anyone else, you are a man, a strong capable man, who already has all those experiential resources within.
This i think is something all of us will suffer as we develop, we project what we feel is not within us.
Im really happy i caught this and with love for my own TRUE identity and personality i can fix this and am fixing this.

Anyone here gone through this? I think that abuse really contributes to depersonalization, from extreme to mild to barely noticeable.

The better we get from the abuse we see who we really are deep down underneath, in terms of personality,sexuality, individuality and others.
And the less we feel the need to fit into the boxes that we created for ourselves in order to once feel safe.
Confidence is coming back into my life, and with confidence i don't feel the need to imitate but the need for self actualization, discovery and realization.

Big love to all of you!

"Survivors need an opportunity to define their own sexuality in their own terms, rather than in reaction to the abuse, so that they stop allowing their offenders to have power over them sexually."

#448160 - 09/25/13 07:34 AM Re: Filling in psychic gaps [Re: justplainme]
On The Fringe Offline

Registered: 09/21/13
Posts: 326
Loc: Southeast USA
I may be missing your point, but I actively do that in a positive way. It is a great tool to refocus on a positive role model.

How would a cm person I know handle this potentially incendiary situation at hand.

Just a thought. I know we all think a little differently. Maybe you can turn it around to work for you.

My dad was an abusive when there drunk. Not many good examples there!
So this strategy fills those gaps. And as you say, I have room to improvise and be me.

I feel more like I do now than I did when I got here.

#448162 - 09/25/13 08:07 AM Re: Filling in psychic gaps [Re: justplainme]
justplainme Offline

Registered: 09/01/09
Posts: 472
I've always taken the hard road...
Most of the men and daugther's in this world have bad malformed mutated Pseudo- father's i honestly believe,but for a few rare exceptions that is not the case,t's not the man behind the word father that's shitty, it's their idea of fatherhood that is. It's being passed down generation to generation and it is one of the reasons why rape is such a huge phenomenon,we are seeing a demonic surge of male masculine energies, 80% Of the worlds prison population is constituted by you and

All people are damaged to my eyes,who say's their not is the bull shitting in your doorstep. So i think it best in my own experience to always follow my own heart, spend time with the girl and see how i play, like a child would. Natural.
Easier said than done though...

Hope your doing well.

"Survivors need an opportunity to define their own sexuality in their own terms, rather than in reaction to the abuse, so that they stop allowing their offenders to have power over them sexually."


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