It sounds like you're confused and frustrated at being blamed by your husband, and needing a ear to listen.
I am sorry you have to go through this.
We're hear, we're listening, just sometimes it is difficult for all those who stop to read, to think they have anything to offer.
One of the effects of CSA, for me anyways.
In particular that we may see some of ourselves in your post.
I don't know that I have anything specific to offer, as my experience is vastly different from your husbands.
Although I am in therapy, and trying to deal with it all, I still struggle to adequately describe how I am affected to my wife.
And I'm sure she has an equally difficult time understanding as well.
But I saw a link yesterday put up by tbkkfile.
The article in the link describes some of the effects of CSA.
Perhaps if you can understand what he is dealing with you can empathize with his struggle.
And in turn realize it has absolutely nothing to do with you and this may help to deal with the confusion etc.
The Link is below.
Additionally, I have read of some on here who have attended AL-ANON family groups.
It seems this is a way to learn to deal with the disfunction of a partner who experienced CSA.
I have no experience with this, so hopefully someone else in the F&F thread can offer more insight into this.
I hope this helps in some way.