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#447175 - 09/14/13 03:05 PM Compensation
Adam A Gedman Offline

Registered: 08/12/13
Posts: 188
Loc: Canada
I looking for a little input from the community.
I would like input from anyone, but Canucks who may have experience with this
would be most helpful to me.
I was poking around the main Male Survivor site and came across a link to
Ontario Ministry of the Attorney General's Victim Services Secretariat.
A little more poking and I discovered
The Criminal Injuries Compensation Board.
The thing that caught my attention was that there is a program that one could apply for compensation if a victim of a violent crime.
Although I don't like the term victim, I believe I am a victim of a violent crime.
If successful, my hope is to receive compensation to pay for my continued therapy, in any and forms that may take.

My question is do you think this is reasonable, acceptable, and has anyone else gone through this process? Can you offer any insight or direction as to how this process works and the likelihood of success?
Presence is the key, for all we have is now.
All we ever have is right now.

Formerly Adam A Gedman (AKA - A damAGed man)

But you can call me Kevin

Toronto Mini WoR - May 2014

#447177 - 09/14/13 03:16 PM Re: Compensation [Re: Adam A Gedman]
risingagain Offline

Registered: 11/10/10
Posts: 597
Loc: Vancouver, BC, Canada
Yes, there is a process for applying for compensation. There are some requirements which I don't know. At BC Male Survivors they have a legal team that knows the process. You might want to try calling them, even though you're from out East. I think it's entirely reasonable that you receive support and help in your healing.

All the best to you, Adam! and all of us survivors out there looking for support!!!

Edited by risingagain (09/14/13 03:17 PM)

#447188 - 09/14/13 05:13 PM Re: Compensation [Re: Adam A Gedman]
Castle Offline

Registered: 10/03/09
Posts: 758
send a pm to geeders... not sure if he's around though.

#447660 - 09/19/13 08:26 PM Re: Compensation [Re: Adam A Gedman]
Adam A Gedman Offline

Registered: 08/12/13
Posts: 188
Loc: Canada
Woo Hoo,

At my session with my therapist Monday, we discussed the Victims Compensation Fund. Apparently a simple process, they will confirm my submission with my therapist and depending on their decision, they will cover the cost of 'X' number of sessions.
There is a possibility for a lump sum as well, but not really what I'm looking for.

Thanks for the replies though, got me to discuss with my therapist, and it looks quite promising.
Presence is the key, for all we have is now.
All we ever have is right now.

Formerly Adam A Gedman (AKA - A damAGed man)

But you can call me Kevin

Toronto Mini WoR - May 2014

#447662 - 09/19/13 08:56 PM Re: Compensation [Re: Adam A Gedman]
victor-victim Offline

Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 6387
Loc: 𝒪 𝒦anada
great news, adam.
glad to hear it.
although it will never truly compensate, get what you can.


#461591 - 02/27/14 02:08 AM Re: Compensation [Re: Adam A Gedman]
pete1973 Offline

Registered: 01/02/14
Posts: 53
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Adam, I am in the process of applying as well and was granted interim funding for therapy which has made a huge impact on my healing. It is a long journey and I still feel like a victim but I know some day I will be able to say I am a survivor and no longer a victim with the help of my counselor and therapist. Good luck and my advise is to be as open and honest with the board as you can, it may be difficult but the more they are able to understand about the impact it has had on you the better the chance of them helping you out. I personally have committed to not keeping any more secrets, my therapist and counselor and helping me to understand and differentiate privacy versus secrets and support my decision to not keep secrets but at the same time have made me understand and accept that I deserve some privacy as well and I don't have to be ashamed anymore about what happened which I constantly have to tell myself and some day I will truly and completely believe it.

#468123 - 07/28/14 04:18 PM Re: Compensation [Re: Adam A Gedman]
Adam A Gedman Offline

Registered: 08/12/13
Posts: 188
Loc: Canada
Hey all,

Thought I would revive this old post because, I did it.

I filled out the application,
collected my receipts
Participated in completing the therapist report, with my T
and just this past week, I testified on my own behalf.
The testimony was in a closed door session.
There were two female adjudicators who heard my case.

The weeks leading up to this had really thrown me off.
Mood swings, general anxiety, irrational fear, the works for me.
I resorted to numbing and some acting out of the abuse.
I was irritable and short with my family.
I became hermit like and anti social.

As it turned out, everything I had mailed was either misplaced or not received at all. More stress.
Luckily enough, we had copied everything I had sent in, and had a copy on hand for them to review.

The testimony took about 1 1/2 hrs, and was very thorough.
I felt like a deer in the headlights.
I had to retell the whole story, in graphic detail.
I was answering questions in minute detail, of what I could remember.
I gradually went into detail about the effects the abuse has had on me.
From the time I was abused, through my angry repressive years, to my current state.

Apparently the adjudicators take some time beyond the day of testimony, to further assess the details etc.
But After a 15 minute break, I was called in so they could give me their ruling.

The lead adjudicator read the ruling, describing my testimony as compelling and credible.
She described how they can take additional time to review the case, but even without my mailed submission, they felt comfortable in making a ruling that day.

I will receive most of what I have already paid out in therapy costs, as well as they covered the cost of my participation in the Toronto Mini WoR.
Additionally I have a lump sum to draw from to further cover ongoing therapy costs.
And lastly, they awarded me pain and suffering compensation.
I don't want o get into how much I received, but this part left me feeling odd.
I couldn't put my finger on it.
Then while eating lunch with my wife, who came with me for support,
She asked me if I was happy with the result, and I truly could not feel any happiness about it.
In fact it felt very weird to be paid.
Almost being paid for sex, at least this is how it manifested in my mind.

That is where I am right now, and isn't that just an additional kick in the gut.
All that self torment and I continue to think in such a way as to further these negative feelings.

I am sure this will change with time though so I am not wallowing.
The money comes at a good time, and takes other pressures off as well, so that is positive.

So there you have it, I dove in, pushed through the process, have a successful outcome, and feel badly about it.
Presence is the key, for all we have is now.
All we ever have is right now.

Formerly Adam A Gedman (AKA - A damAGed man)

But you can call me Kevin

Toronto Mini WoR - May 2014

#468136 - 07/28/14 08:27 PM Re: Compensation [Re: Adam A Gedman]
don64 Offline

Registered: 10/09/13
Posts: 1106
Hi Kevin,

I'm happy your efforts have been rewarded, and happy for the message the ruling sends, and the effect the ruling has on building momentum and supporting our cause.

For me, I have learned to take statements such as "feel badly about it" and shorten them to "feel badly." Most of the time, for me, the "it" doesn't have anything to do with why I feel badly. My feeling badly is learned as a result of my abuse.

Sending you love and support,

Divine Law is not judgment or denial of self truths. Divine Law is honoring harmony that comes from a peaceful mind, an open heart, a true tongue, a light step, a forgiving nature, and a love of all living creatures. Jamie Sams & David Carson, Medicine Cards

#468138 - 07/28/14 08:47 PM Re: Compensation [Re: Adam A Gedman]
Bluedogone Offline

Registered: 07/03/13
Posts: 1132
Loc: Southern US
Congratulations on the follow through and success. That's good news. It would be even more of a just victory if the perps had to provide all the money. Now, all the therapy that may be needed in the future is assured.

I suppose it's only natural to feel a little apprehension that you were paid for sex, but I hope that feeling can be quickly squashed completely, since that is hardly the case. It's just not possible to put a price on what the abuse has cost. The financial as well as emotional strain just seems to never end. At least this puts the financial part in better shape, and I celebrate this victory with you.

I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year:
“Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.”
And he replied:
“Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God.
That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way.” - quoted by King George VI


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