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#445863 - 08/29/13 03:34 PM Another step forward
Banjo596 Offline

Registered: 08/20/13
Posts: 93
Loc: Ohio
I've been on the path to healing for just over 7 weeks today. My mother, my (soon to be) ex-wife, my therapist, and four close friends know about my abuse.
Add my brother to that. My mom went to lunch with my bro and his family earlier in the week, and my brother asked her the reason I was still in therapy for divorce, was there something else going on?
She did not know how to answer because she promised me that she would not tell, with the understanding I would talk about it when and with whom I wanted.
Well, my brother nailed it, asking her straight up if __________ molested me when I was young. He also said something similar happened to him, but by someone different.
She came by the house this morning, and she was very upset. She has TWO sons who this happened to and she feels so guilty for not seeing it then or doing something about it.
I lovingly reassured her that in NO WAY do I hold her accountable or responsible for what occurred.
Funny how I am still having issues with my own feelings of guilt and shame but so easily and readily can tell her she should have none.

As a result of our conversation, and after she left, I placed a phone call to the local police. I believe my abuser is still living in the area. I spoke with a detective and relayed details of my abuse, dates, and the abusers name.
I realize much too much time has passed for me to have a case against him, but I also believe a zebra can't change it's stripes and there is a good chance he is still committing these terrible crimes.
If my phone call can result in stopping ANY abuse, I feel I have accomplished a great deal.
I feel good for having made that phone call, even though many years have gone by, and HOPE something comes of it.
It is time for that bastard to pay for the 37+ years of my life he has ruined and probably countless other lives as well.

Edited by Banjo596 (08/29/13 11:37 PM)

#446062 - 08/31/13 07:29 PM Re: Another step forward [Re: Banjo596]
Rich1967 Online   content

Registered: 07/18/13
Posts: 617
Loc: PA

Sorry for what happened to you. Looks like you are new here like me, so welcome as well.

I think you did a great thing by calling the police. I also think what happened between your mom and brother highlights the benefits of being more open about sexual abuse. I hope you and your brother are able be more supportive of each other since unfortunately you have a shared experience. The more we talk about it the more we can support those afraid to talk and maybe less kids will get abused as a result.

Don't be too hard on yourself. You experienced one of the worst things that can happen to a human being. It's going to cause some problems, but with hard work you can get through it.
"Me too"-I don't think I will ever get tired of saying or hearing these two words.
My Story


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