to be honest, I am not certain I process the shame. It comes, it stays for awhile, I do not such cool stuff because I have those feelings of being not so cool and then it retreats for awhile and life becomes normal again. And standing in the back of the room, in the corner, is always Mr. Shame, ready to ruin any occasion or happening at his whim.
I have learned to cope and process so much while doing the therapy, but the shame still can have such a strong hold when it appears.
btw... never be embarrassed to write or ask anything. Every topic we discuss here touches more than just the author of the query. I thank you for asking, because it makes me think. And I may ask the T the same question this week.
For now we see through a glass, darkly.