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#439753 - 07/01/13 11:55 PM i told someone
traveler Offline

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 4011
Loc: resettling in NE Ohio
i didn't plan to. it just happened.

a friend was telling me about his daughter - who had been abused by a boyfriend. i've know the family for at least 5 years. she was one of my students. i knew that there was something wrong - but not what had happened. my friend - the girl's father - was telling me she was seeing a T but they were still concerned about her. i could tell that - of course - the parents as well as the girl were all hurting.

i wanted to help. all i could think of was to tell him what had happened to me. i wanted to give him something that would make him feel better.

i said: "there is something i want to tell you. i was also abused as a kid. but i didn't get any help until i was in my 30s. instead i repressed it and denied it and it festered and infected m whole life. i am so thankful that your daughter is getting help NOW - with no delay."

i was shaking and choking up and starting to tear as i spoke. he reached out and hugged me. i was surprised. i wanted to comfort him. but he also comforted me. he said i was her favorite teacher and that i had already helped her more than i knew - even without knowing of her circumstances. i'm glad i told. maybe that will help a little, too.

"My experience has shown me that I all too often tend to deny that which lies behind, but as I still believe, that which is denied cannot be healed." Brennan Manning, "All is Grace - A Ragamuffin Memoir"

#439758 - 07/02/13 12:22 AM Re: i told someone [Re: traveler]
Cdn_Kirby Offline

Registered: 06/17/13
Posts: 3
Loc: Canada
That was a very brave and noble thing to do.

I'm new here and just started with my healing jouney after 30 years but the one thing I know is that the only people who understand, truely understand, are other survivors.

#439762 - 07/02/13 12:51 AM Re: i told someone [Re: traveler]
Dave PNW Offline

Registered: 04/03/13
Posts: 129
Loc: Pacific Northwest
Lee, that was brave and powerful. What you said to that father will stay with him and help to make sure his daughter gets the help she needs. You remind me that through these horrible things we know about abuse and betrayal we can forge this into something new that we can use to help others who suffer. Thank you.

#439772 - 07/02/13 02:56 AM Re: i told someone [Re: traveler]
peroperic2009 Offline


Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3813
Loc: South-East Europe
Hey Lee,
it is soooo good to see you back here wink
You know it brought tears to me not the fact that you were so brave and wanted to help but rather this:
Originally Posted By: traveler
he said i was her favorite teacher and that i had already helped her more than i knew - even without knowing of her circumstances.
We already knew that you are great teacher, but it is nice to hear it like this directly wink
My story

#439778 - 07/02/13 08:20 AM Re: i told someone [Re: traveler]
OCN Offline

Registered: 02/05/13
Posts: 392
Loc: Western Europe
Tears in my eyes!! Beautiful Lee..
Trust me, you are worth it to love yourself!

I now know who I am - I've never been anybody else!

#439779 - 07/02/13 08:54 AM Re: i told someone [Re: traveler]
unhappycamper Offline

Registered: 10/21/11
Posts: 747
Loc: VA
Good on ya, Lee!

"It is never wise to turn aside from knowing, however the knowing comes." -- Mary Stewart,The Hollow Hills

"Silence is the weapon, shame is the ammunition." -- me smile


#439799 - 07/02/13 01:55 PM Re: i told someone [Re: traveler]
bodyguard8367 Offline

Registered: 05/16/12
Posts: 1159
Loc: ""
Welcome Back Lee,

You know we love you.

Awesome Standing in the Gap for your student.


#439836 - 07/02/13 08:10 PM Re: i told someone [Re: traveler]
BraveFalcon Offline

Registered: 02/25/13
Posts: 1231
Loc: The ATL

Way to go Lee! That took a lot of guts and probably a deep desire to help any way you could. It sounds like you probably helped them more than you could know in just sharing that with them and in doing so had a breakthrough and reached a milestone yourself. Kudos man! Peace,



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