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#431775 - 04/19/13 07:33 PM Hey Everyone
TMan1394 Offline

Registered: 04/16/13
Posts: 11
Loc: USA
Hi Everyone,
I just wanted to introduce myself to all of you and all the wonderful people who have and continue to keep this community and form running. I'm still cautious, but reading and seeing the level of effort that goes into making this place as safe as possible has empowered me with the knowledge of what to be aware of and given me the strength to finally join.
I've read a lot of the articles, watched some of the video links, did a lot of research on malesurvior itself and read a lot about the courageous men who founded this place for people like me. That being said, I realized I've barely scratched the surface but what's important to me is I've overcome a lot just by being able to write this.
I assume at some point everyone on here had to write this first introduction so I don't want to elaborate on where I am right now or say anything that could be harmful to someone else reading this.
I just wanted to conclude by saying I know the road ahead is going to be tough and I have a lot of questions, fears and thoughts about that. However at the same time, and to me, more important than the worries, are that I feel hope for the first time in my life and I can't put into words how much that means to me. Thanks guy, T

#431805 - 04/20/13 02:38 AM Re: Hey Everyone [Re: TMan1394]
Jude Offline

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1633
Loc: New England
Welcome TMan!

Sounds like you did your homework. You are in good company. There are all kinds of men here, all ages, races, types, orientations, and backgrounds. The one common thread is we've come to face what was done to us as boys. I kept my secret for 42 years. Others here are younger men who have the courage to deal with this at an age where I was still hiding. However long its taken to arrive at this point, we support and encourage ourselves by telling our stories to other guys who "get it", without judegement.

Hope to hear more form you.

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Sarah McLachlan

#431815 - 04/20/13 04:45 AM Re: Hey Everyone [Re: TMan1394]
SoccerStar Offline

Registered: 10/15/12
Posts: 929
Hello TMan,

That hope you feel is real - and the potential for recovery is just as real too. You've shown yourself to be very diligent in "doing your homework" on this process.... that is SUCH a good sign.... if you devote yourself to it and take advantage of all the healthy therapeutic resources available to you, I think you're going to feel better than you have in a long time.

You can't change the past, but this place is one among many resources that can help make your future a better one. Welcome!

My story

"Don't think it hasn't been a little slice of Heaven just because it hasn't!" --Bugs Bunny

#431816 - 04/20/13 04:59 AM Re: Hey Everyone [Re: TMan1394]
Choi Choi Offline

Registered: 04/13/13
Posts: 10

You got it correct! smile

This community does make a lot of difference to each person who has been part of this.

It does works for me too.

Regards smile
Remind yourself: "I feel afraid but I am not in danger! I am safe now, here in the present." Remember you are now in the safety of the present, far from the danger of the past.

Choi Choi

#431826 - 04/20/13 06:03 AM Re: Hey Everyone [Re: TMan1394]
traveler Offline

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 4284
Loc: resettling in NE Ohio
Welcome, TMan!

so sorry that you had to become one of us.
but glad you feel accepted here.
this place and these guys can make a huge difference.

all the best,
How long, LORD, must I call for help, but you do not listen?
Or cry out to you, “Violence!” but you do not save?
Why do you make me look at injustice?
Why do you tolerate wrongdoing?...
Therefore the law is paralyzed, and justice never prevails....
Habakkuk 1:2-3

#432594 - 04/27/13 03:41 AM Re: Hey Everyone [Re: Jude]
TMan1394 Offline

Registered: 04/16/13
Posts: 11
Loc: USA
Thanks Jude,
It really was an inspirational feeling when I found this place and saw the courage of all the other members willing to open up and share things I thought I could never tell anyone. Like you said the ability to be able to share and talk with other guys who get it is has done so much for me already. It's something I never even thought to look for and even though I talked about it once with a T, I still felt alone until I came here. I've been reading the different forums but I still feel that hesitation to open up about myself. However the more I read the more connected I feel. I'm building up the strength to getting more involved and looking forward to talking more.

#432596 - 04/27/13 03:57 AM Re: Hey Everyone [Re: SoccerStar]
TMan1394 Offline

Registered: 04/16/13
Posts: 11
Loc: USA
I appreciate it Matt. I went therapy shopping after doing a lot of reading off of here and collecting all my thoughts and I believe in the person I choose to work with. Sometimes I still question myself and if I'm ready but I made a promise to myself about a month ago to make my recovery the number one thing in my life. I've let what happened to me control my mind, thoughts and actions my whole life and I'm determined to end that cycle. Your last line about the past and the future is so true. I still can't completely envision how my journey is going to go and what's ahead but I believe I can and will recover. Thanks for responding back to my post and the support.

#432598 - 04/27/13 04:02 AM Re: Hey Everyone [Re: Choi Choi]
TMan1394 Offline

Registered: 04/16/13
Posts: 11
Loc: USA
Thanks Choi Choi,
It's good to know that I'm no longer alone anymore. Appreciate your response to my post and glad to hear it's worked for you. I believe with all my heart it's gonna work for me too.

#432599 - 04/27/13 04:10 AM Re: Hey Everyone [Re: traveler]
TMan1394 Offline

Registered: 04/16/13
Posts: 11
Loc: USA
Thanks Lee,
This place and the brave guys here already have and I believe for the first time in my life I can find recovery. I know it's gonna be tough, probably tougher than I can even understand right now but I'm tired of running and ready to face my demons. Appreciate the support it means a lot. T


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