thank you lbcali. i use analogies as well... i too come across aggressive when i speak directly. my wife hates analogies (yet another of the many things i'm not good at for her).
i like the analogy describing how this is a new road. you're absolutely right. i was in the navy, so this is uncharted waters. these are deep or shallow, reefs or not, we just don't know. anything could impede our progress and we won't see it coming. i like that analogy a lot. best i can figure, being honest is the best way to tackle this shit. if we hit a reef, stop, assess the damage, reroute, and continue. we can't foresee our obstacles, we can only deal with them as they come.
May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground, carry on. ~Fun.