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#430579 - 04/09/13 02:31 AM Can't Think of a Title
lukedamien Offline

Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 68
Thanks everyone

Edited by lukedamien (04/09/13 09:28 PM)
Edit Reason: issue is being resolved today

#430588 - 04/09/13 04:40 AM Re: Can't Think of a Title [Re: lukedamien]
genedebs Offline

Registered: 11/09/12
Posts: 378
Loc: MO
Dear luke

What you have described is that you are being stalked. You are not overplaying. I do not know what rights you have and if the cop is right.

I do know what you have described is dangerous.

He blamed you for his violent sexual acts. He called you a cock tease and acted like he was going to demonstrate his power.

I know what I would reccomend to a women who was being stalked, but I am not familiar with the norms and standARDS in the LGBT world.

#430589 - 04/09/13 04:56 AM Re: Can't Think of a Title [Re: lukedamien]
ThisMan Offline

Registered: 01/23/13
Posts: 778
Loc: upper south
Luke- Welcome and thanks for sharing your concerns. I have some serious thoughts I think you should consider. Never accept an intimate act from another person regardless how far it has progressed if you become uncomfortable. Never accept the pain inflicted by someone during sex. Ever. Never let anyone verbally abuse you and say demeaning things to you in the context of sex if it makes you uncomfortable or fearful.

You deserve to be respected and I encourage you to accept nothing less. And its really good that you spoke with the officer regarding your safety concerns. If the friend has your number, he will probably text you again. Be very careful how you respond, if you respond at all. If he is a stalker, you won't have any doubts 'cause he will let you know. And always, always, always listen to your instincts.
For now we see through a glass, darkly.

#430592 - 04/09/13 05:16 AM Re: Can't Think of a Title [Re: genedebs]
lukedamien Offline

Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 68
This is scaring me now. Do you really think he was trying to control me then??? He really seemed sorry and thought I was enjoying myself. That's the reason he's not allowed back and he seems to be respecting it. But seeing him around a bit is scary cause there's only three things I know about him.

His cell number

The name he gave me

How he and his cars look. He has two different cars I've seen him in.

It's not unusual to run into people every once and a wh while where I'm from. Even though it's been a bit. I never considered it truly scary until he drove past my new house I just moved to.

It could just be nothing though. He knows where I live and work. He knows where I go to school. He knows my first and real last name. I only know his cell number and the two cars he have. Not the plate. Never made a career of writing down a dudes plates.

I talked with this officer who comes to my job. I was vague. I know the officer has a wedding band on. But I just harmlessly flirt with him. Doubt it would go anywhere just for fun. I promise. But he kinda jokes about gay dudes always being too slutty when I flirt. The officer I mean.

So telling him the circumstances I was vague about the two sexual encounters cause I didn't want him to know that I brought this on myself. He said there's nothing the law could do if all he's doing is waving at me or striking up a conversation

Then the cop joked and said flirt with him. I laughed but it really wasn't funny. I've pretty much accepted he didn't try to hurt me. It was just a way of fun. I didn't try to say no or stop it. He didn't know about my csa.

But this will keep me more aware. I'll. Start to communicate with him by text messages to log his true replies to his motives with me. I'll also request a face picture and his home address claiming I really need to hookup with him at his house since my new move and rommates.

This will at least maybe give me a leg up in case this is more than chance encounters and bump into-s

Other than that, I believe the cop is right. He's always in a good mood when he calls, text, or bumps into me. He's not threatening me at all. So I'll inbox you and keep you informed if something turns wrong. Thanks for replying.


#430603 - 04/09/13 05:57 AM Re: Can't Think of a Title [Re: lukedamien]
genedebs Offline

Registered: 11/09/12
Posts: 378
Loc: MO
Dear Ttyl

I recommend that you not ask for a face picture and his home address if you do not intend to hookup with him again! If he is stalking you this would be additional encouragement.

#430604 - 04/09/13 06:00 AM Re: Can't Think of a Title [Re: lukedamien]
overcomer4life Offline

Registered: 02/25/09
Posts: 198
Wow. You didn't deserve having his nails dug into you. I cried when I read that part. Geesh.

The fact that you see him more often says "stalker" to me, and I pray for your protection. It could be coincidence, but that's a big coincidence, if so...

#430613 - 04/09/13 07:21 AM Re: Can't Think of a Title [Re: genedebs]
lukedamien Offline

Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 68
My name is actually Luke

Sorry lol

ttyl just means 'talk to you later'

guess it's a silly way to chat.

I was just thinking getting the info on him in case it's a bad situation might be good. But I guess I wont. Maybe I really am just reading too much into all of it. Aside from his dominating bed character. He is real charming when we bump into each other and really seems to like me alot. It feels good to be hungered by his eyes. Not just the typical I want sex with you look. I hate that crap. I mean he looks at me like he wants me. Like a marriage kinda want. He really is cool when we talk. I think maybe I'm really over thinking the happen meets. We do live in the same city. I usually walk the same routes to work and school everyday around the same times when I have to go there. So it might not be too far a strength that I'd see him if he has the same time to drive or be certain areas nearby. Thanks though.

#430629 - 04/09/13 01:13 PM Re: Can't Think of a Title [Re: lukedamien]
dumont Offline

Registered: 03/28/13
Posts: 34
Loc: No where
If you see him again "randomly" you should text him and tell him to stop. Do not make conversation. Tell him that you think he is stalking you and that if that behavior doesn't stop immediately you will take action, i.e. ask for police intervention.
Don't know where you live but here I can go to the police and explain the situation, you don't need to get into the exact details, it's not important. But here they would contact him and ask for an explanation of his behavior.
Usually that gets them running. These ass holes always hide from real authority.
This is what I would do.
Be safe,


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