I must say that your post very much reminded me about Sam's post on playing golf: http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthr...7432#Post417432
Well it is always difficult to do something when we are not felt good with it. And for survivors who have in background some negative self image playing all time it is even more difficult.
Such situation could shows related to music, playing some sport, going to drink in some public place, being in company with a lot of guys, being in company with a lot of women, lol, anything list could be endless.
But you know it does get better with time, it really does.
To me always help to get used to environment and occasions (and I need some time for that), to learn more about people involved, to find place not in front of everyone but somewhere behind, to become friend to other people involved...
And when it become possible for me to go out of my head there. To start interacting with others and by so stop being concentrated on my wrong doings, my mistakes, my comparisons to others, my inadequacy and all other my the most negative traits, lol, than I know that I'm on way to overcome my anxiety and to be my self there in pure meaning of those words even while I'm doing something that I'm not good at.
So maybe you could try couple more times to see if you'll feel more relaxed there and than you can easily decide?
I would do something like that in your place.
Hang on Lee!