Newest Members
chairdesklamp, Bill Ohio USA, jez, Long Way Home, Bcbornleo
13595 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
bdr (54), Duane99 (2018), Henry_MD (60), Jimi (64)
Who's Online
3 registered (Noah Barrett, 2 invisible), 28 Guests and 4 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
13,595 Registered Members
75 Forums
70,717 Topics
493,868 Posts

Most users ever online: 418 @ 07/02/12 11:29 AM
Topic Options
#418031 - 12/03/12 02:56 PM Feeling out of place
onlyakid Offline

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1577
Loc: New Jersey
I was with a friend who I primarily know from the Internet and had never met. I went up to his area and went to a bar he frequents and knows the bartender. So I'm sitting at the bar and he introduces me to the bartender and eventually the bartender asks me 5 favorite movies of all time. I don't go out to the movies and can't really come up with the answer. Combine that with the fact that he knew alot of the people in the bar. It was almost like a cheers situation with my friend being Norm. I felt so out of place and I felt like I embarrassed him too. Otherwise the day went fine.

"Being with people that understand you...Priceless"

"and i don't want the world to see me, cause i don't think that they'd understand"

"You don't know what love just do as your told"

"My life has changed. What you take as a simple thing, is not so simple for me anymore"

#418068 - 12/03/12 11:03 PM Re: Feeling out of place [Re: onlyakid]
SmartShadow Offline

Registered: 11/27/12
Posts: 447
I can relate,
I have spent so much time managing a sence of cohesion that I am socially awkward a lot of the time. I try and stay in the back ground and have learned to redirect conversations to cover it up. Sort of works as long as you keep moving and don't give any one to much access. Tough duble bind. Isolation is bad, but being real and vulnerable not so easy.

And how do you find a safe person anyway.
I have found people fall into "Less Safe and More Safe"

As soon as I feal the odd man out the others are less safe.

Regards, SS

#418071 - 12/03/12 11:40 PM Re: Feeling out of place [Re: SmartShadow]
Afldman Offline

Registered: 07/12/12
Posts: 67
Loc: Pacific Northwest
Originally Posted By: SmartShadow
As soon as I feal the odd man out the others are less safe.

I have ALWAYS felt like the odd man out. I walk into a room and people start laughing, it's at me. I walk into a room and people start/stop talking, it's about me. I would say I'm narcissistic but that implies that I think I'm "so great" which is the opposite of the truth.
"Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them." -Daliai Lama

#418073 - 12/03/12 11:56 PM Re: Feeling out of place [Re: onlyakid]
jcm Offline

Registered: 05/27/09
Posts: 37
Loc: Los Angeles, CA
Social situations can always create circumstances which are uncomfortable for people like us.

Props to you for actually going out, meeting people and being social. That takes courage. Be proud of yourself for that.


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.