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#417655 - 11/29/12 06:27 PM Effects of Sexual Abuse
Mountainous Buck Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/15/09
Posts: 1631
Loc: Minnesota
I've been thinking about discussing this topic at a general meeting for our local Men's Center: "Effects of Sexual Abuse"

What would you share as the top lasting effects of your abuse experience?

I'd say for me this includes:

1) addiction (alcohol/sex)
2) shut down emotions
3) lack of trust
4) body image issues/confused sexuality

I continue to heal and recover from these effects and more. I've found a lot of healing and support over the years, and feel like I have/we have only just begun making inroads into addressing this issue in the world.

Let me know your thoughts.
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We have to take responsibility for what we're not responsible for.

�It doesn't matter where you've come from,
It matters where you go" Frank Turner

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#417656 - 11/29/12 06:31 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 4046
Loc: resettling in NE Ohio
good start -
i say YES to all the above.
i would add -
damage to self-esteem - distinct from body image and sexual identity and orientation issues.
lee


Edited by traveler (11/29/12 06:31 PM)
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"My experience has shown me that I all too often tend to deny that which lies behind, but as I still believe, that which is denied cannot be healed." Brennan Manning, "All is Grace - A Ragamuffin Memoir"

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#417658 - 11/29/12 06:48 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
Chase Eric Offline

Moderator
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 2517
Number one on my list is the confusion of sexual identity which in turn leads to a refusal to accept oneself and ultimately shame and isolation. It all starts with the lost sense of that most intimate of personal identities.
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#417671 - 11/29/12 08:09 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
Magellan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/31/10
Posts: 1585
Loc: California
Self loathing.
"Anger at life"
"Anger at the universe"
"Angry for being born"
"Feeling like a victim for simply being born"

I've had all of these.

I don't know why all that is in quotes. Oh well.


Edited by Magellan (11/29/12 08:31 PM)

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#417679 - 11/29/12 09:18 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
Suwanee Offline

Chat Moderator
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 10/30/12
Posts: 1179
Loc: SE USA
.
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I've got this life
And the will to show
I will always be
Better than before
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#417704 - 11/30/12 12:43 AM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
crazy gecko Offline


Registered: 10/04/12
Posts: 309
I can repeat some of the answers, and add a few...

Anger/self loathing - yup, me too.
Period of sexual confusion - yup, me too. (fortunately not nearly as bad as what some of the other guys here are struggling with)
Addiction - yes.
Fear of intimacy
Inability to trust
Need to always be in control
Depression (multiple suicide attempts)
Guilt, shame, feeling like I don't deserve to be happy.
Self-injury

And of course, my official diagnosis - PTSD, BPD, Depersonalisation disorder, Major depression.
_________________________
I guess what I'm trying to say
Is whose life is it anyway because livin'
Living is the best revenge
You can play
-- Def Leppard

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#417715 - 11/30/12 02:46 AM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
Jude Offline


Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1633
Loc: New England
You guys have covered it all. Sign me up for the next train to the funny farm.
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Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
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#417722 - 11/30/12 04:54 AM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1739
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
Hi There MB

Nice to see you back you've been away for a while.
I am glad that you are still in the process, and wish you God Speed in your healing.

I would like to add
"Rage"
"Homophobia"
"Suicidal"

Martin
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#417724 - 11/30/12 06:26 AM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 2523
Loc: durham, north england
Hi buck.

Interesting question, I'll add some of mine.
A sense of worthlessness and hyper self cryticism that affects anything I do.
Recurrent bouts of depression even when there is little or no reason.
A struggle with becoming addicted to isolation.
Discomfort with any sort of physical contact.
Genophobia so profound it makes any sort of relationship an impossibility..

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#417779 - 11/30/12 03:42 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
1lifenow Offline


Registered: 03/07/11
Posts: 437
Loc: west coast
Great thread MB

The inability to be me. Trust or accept who I was or even know who I was. The running away from my true self as I am in the present.

All the other stuff the you have all described followed as the result of the trying to bury any real feelings.

hugz grant
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The need for love lies at the very foundation of human existence. Dalai Lama

WoR Barrie 2011

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