Newest Members
SupportiveOne, ZCarr, MissSunshine1206, Kotar1, kando
13159 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
Brian Kjolby (51), lollog (60), nevragan (35), Raphael (46), rjc1186 (56)
Who's Online
1 registered (1 invisible), 25 Guests and 6 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
13,159 Registered Members
75 Forums
68,232 Topics
474,983 Posts

Most users ever online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
Topic Options
#417655 - 11/29/12 06:27 PM Effects of Sexual Abuse
Mountainous Buck Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/15/09
Posts: 1627
Loc: Minnesota
I've been thinking about discussing this topic at a general meeting for our local Men's Center: "Effects of Sexual Abuse"

What would you share as the top lasting effects of your abuse experience?

I'd say for me this includes:

1) addiction (alcohol/sex)
2) shut down emotions
3) lack of trust
4) body image issues/confused sexuality

I continue to heal and recover from these effects and more. I've found a lot of healing and support over the years, and feel like I have/we have only just begun making inroads into addressing this issue in the world.

Let me know your thoughts.
_________________________
We have to take responsibility for what we're not responsible for.

�It doesn't matter where you've come from,
It matters where you go" Frank Turner

Top
#417656 - 11/29/12 06:31 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3956
Loc: settling in the USA again
good start -
i say YES to all the above.
i would add -
damage to self-esteem - distinct from body image and sexual identity and orientation issues.
lee


Edited by traveler (11/29/12 06:31 PM)
_________________________
"My experience has shown me that I all too often tend to deny that which lies behind, but as I still believe, that which is denied cannot be healed." Brennan Manning, "All is Grace - A Ragamuffin Memoir"

Top
#417658 - 11/29/12 06:48 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
Chase Eric Offline

Moderator
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 2354
Number one on my list is the confusion of sexual identity which in turn leads to a refusal to accept oneself and ultimately shame and isolation. It all starts with the lost sense of that most intimate of personal identities.
_________________________

..


Top
#417671 - 11/29/12 08:09 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
Magellan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/31/10
Posts: 1566
Loc: California
Self loathing.
"Anger at life"
"Anger at the universe"
"Angry for being born"
"Feeling like a victim for simply being born"

I've had all of these.

I don't know why all that is in quotes. Oh well.


Edited by Magellan (11/29/12 08:31 PM)

Top
#417679 - 11/29/12 09:18 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
Suwanee Offline

Chat Moderator
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 10/30/12
Posts: 1110
Loc: SE USA
.
_________________________
"His voice rose under the black smoke before the burning wreckage of the island; and infected by that emotion, the other little boys began to shake and sob too. And in the middle of them....Ralph wept for the end of innocence, the darkness of man’s heart…”. -----William Golding

Top
#417704 - 11/30/12 12:43 AM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
crazy gecko Offline


Registered: 10/04/12
Posts: 309
I can repeat some of the answers, and add a few...

Anger/self loathing - yup, me too.
Period of sexual confusion - yup, me too. (fortunately not nearly as bad as what some of the other guys here are struggling with)
Addiction - yes.
Fear of intimacy
Inability to trust
Need to always be in control
Depression (multiple suicide attempts)
Guilt, shame, feeling like I don't deserve to be happy.
Self-injury

And of course, my official diagnosis - PTSD, BPD, Depersonalisation disorder, Major depression.
_________________________
I guess what I'm trying to say
Is whose life is it anyway because livin'
Living is the best revenge
You can play
-- Def Leppard

My Story, Part 2

My blog

Top
#417715 - 11/30/12 02:46 AM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
Jude Offline


Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1633
Loc: New England
You guys have covered it all. Sign me up for the next train to the funny farm.
_________________________
I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Sarah McLachlan

Top
#417722 - 11/30/12 04:54 AM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1739
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
Hi There MB

Nice to see you back you've been away for a while.
I am glad that you are still in the process, and wish you God Speed in your healing.

I would like to add
"Rage"
"Homophobia"
"Suicidal"

Martin
_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

Top
#417724 - 11/30/12 06:26 AM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 2398
Loc: durham, north england
Hi buck.

Interesting question, I'll add some of mine.
A sense of worthlessness and hyper self cryticism that affects anything I do.
Recurrent bouts of depression even when there is little or no reason.
A struggle with becoming addicted to isolation.
Discomfort with any sort of physical contact.
Genophobia so profound it makes any sort of relationship an impossibility..

Top
#417779 - 11/30/12 03:42 PM Re: Effects of Sexual Abuse [Re: Mountainous Buck]
1lifenow Offline


Registered: 03/07/11
Posts: 437
Loc: west coast
Great thread MB

The inability to be me. Trust or accept who I was or even know who I was. The running away from my true self as I am in the present.

All the other stuff the you have all described followed as the result of the trying to bury any real feelings.

hugz grant
_________________________
The need for love lies at the very foundation of human existence. Dalai Lama

WoR Barrie 2011

Top
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >

Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.