and I'm announcing it to all my circles so that I Follow Through.
It's been suggested to me MANY times over the years that I consider doing this, and I always shied away from doing it because of fear and my CSA issues.
But I did have a few years of experience working with 'at risk' teens in an after school program. It was one of the most challenging and rewarding things I'd ever done, and I was astonished at how easy it was for me to build a rapport with them. Some of those kids fell in love with me, and idolized me. A few of them have friended me on Facebook, to my surprise.
With all the work I've been doing to love myself, I've been VERY frustrated that I could never feel the love I have been demonstrating to myself with all my efforts. I still feel empty and lacking and totally disconnected.
Jude has kicked me in the butt with another reminder - and I'm taking his suggestion. I'm starting the application process and will follow through and start volunteering and working with kids. They deserve it, and *I* deserve it. I felt connected and valued when I worked with kids before, and I will do it again for my own sake.
Wish me luck - the application process is apparently hard and time consuming, and they need latino volunteers, not white people like me. So I may ultimately be rejected because there is no need for me. But if my HP is working in my life, my HP will make the opportunity happen.
HP? You listening?