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#414734 - 10/30/12 11:34 AM My 11 year-old self vs my 40 year-old self
Suwanee Offline

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MaleSurvivor


Registered: 10/30/12
Posts: 1107
Loc: SE USA
.
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"His voice rose under the black smoke before the burning wreckage of the island; and infected by that emotion, the other little boys began to shake and sob too. And in the middle of them....Ralph wept for the end of innocence, the darkness of man’s heart…”. -----William Golding

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#414793 - 10/30/12 08:13 PM Re: My 11 year-old self vs my 40 year-old self [Re: Suwanee]
traveler Offline
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Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3952
Loc: settling in the USA again
right - probly most of us go through that. look at an 11-yr-old boy and then see if you could blame him for "letting" that happen to him - especially when confronted with a perp who is older, bigger, stronger, more numerous or in a status or position of greater power. it is not rational - it is judging your younger self by your present standards. it takes a while to get past that. we don't like to remember what it really felt like at the time (fear, helplessness, confusion, etc), so we substitute our present thoughts and feelings.

tell yourself "IT WAS NOT MY FAULT!" about 2,000 times a day - and in a couple years you'll start to believe it!

BTW - the "Tears for Fears" quote in your sig is a nice touch!
lee
_________________________
"the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues it can begin to feel commonplace and eventually acceptable."
- Alan Cumming, "Not My Father's Son"

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