Long day today, a lot happened. I went to Oak Park, Illinois for my first counselors appointment at home (from school). It went ok. I was all over the Chicagoland area, went from Chicago, to Dyer, Indiana, back home, out to look at cars, from dealership to dealership. All of this with my 2 year old nephew.
At this point I can tell you right now, I am never having kids. Too much for me to handle. Between the crappy Indiana drivers
and the kid running everywhere and phone calls on my cell. I felt like I was enclosed in a little tiny box and I couldn't get out. I was getting soooooo frustrated. My head is spinning right now, too much to think about (as usual). I feel like i am going crazy, if you really want to know what is going through my head it's "I don't know" over and over and over and over and over. You get the idea.
Take a deap breath.......ok
I need to relax, and I can't...always tense, always active, always self-conscience, always easily irritated. I've been getting headaches every night for the past 2 maybe 3 weeks. Stress-headaches?
None of my friends have called me in 4 days...I don't want to call them, only because I will feel out of place because I haven't hung out with them since i go away to school.
Alone...always alone, no one knows what I go through on a daily basis because they don't care. I am seeing now that they all either live on a cloud or in denial. I am left to deal with the reality of me. I hate it...
This will make it two summer breaks in a row that really suck!
I have another long day tomorrow!