I was abused by my older sister when I was about 12. She used control to abuse. She would catch me at various things (smoking, etc.) and threaten to tell our mom. She'd use that to force me into the abuse.

The family I grew up in on the surface was very normal, but my mom was an alcholic (now recovering) and my father stopped drinking, but I don't think he realized he was an alcoholic.

I'm the youngest of three. My brother, the oldest, physically abused me, but not sexually. I've recently talked to my therapist about that and he says I probably suffer from some PTSD over that.

My sister, who may have been abused herself, abused me when I was just entering puberty. There was no intercourse, but there was simulated intercourse, in that she had me lie on top of her clothed and "dry hump." She also made me undress to show her my puberty progress.

This didn't last long, maybe a couple of months, but she still used the control to get what she wanted from me, even if it wasn't sexual abuse later on.

After reading others' stories, and the horrible experiences they have had, I feel like mine isn't so terrible. But why do I feel like so alone?

Edited by ModTeam (08/24/12 06:39 AM)
Edit Reason: Trigger warning added.
I just want to be me.