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#402334 - 07/02/12 09:04 AM False memory?
ahyden Offline

Registered: 05/22/12
Posts: 21
So 3 weeks ago I finally went to a psychologist for help and told him about the memories that has started to come back but he didn't believe me! He thought it was a false memory or implanted memory, since it happened while I was going to a therapist. But the therapist I went to didn't to any kind of memory recover stuff, I just started to remember one day.

The whole reason I went to him is because I can't deal with the memories and chaos inside.

He did give me antidepressant medication, called Pristiq, a new kind he claimed that barely has any side effect but since taking it I've gotten worse and worse. After about a 2-3 weeks I started getting horrible violent dreams I decided to stop and have started to reduce the dosage. I will never take that again.

What is the point of psychologist? Are they supposed to help me ? How can they help me if they don't believe me?

Edited by ahyden (07/02/12 09:14 AM)

#402363 - 07/02/12 05:38 PM Re: False memory? [Re: ahyden]
Napoleon Offline

Registered: 04/07/11
Posts: 166
Loc: Utah
I have had the same experience with repressed memories. I have no reservations that my flash backs are / were real experinces.

IF YOUR PSYC IS NOT WORKING FOR YOU FIND A NEW ONE. That would be my advise. They are supposed to help. If he isn't doing his job, tind a new Phyc that is willing to work with you. One that has experience with repressed memories. I have had a bad experience with most phycs…
�Your only limit within reason, is the one that you set up in your own mind.� Napoleon Hill, The Law of Success, 1925.

#402369 - 07/02/12 06:04 PM . [Re: ahyden]
Life's A Dream Offline

Registered: 08/25/11
Posts: 886
Loc: Bouvet Island

Edited by Life's A Dream (01/13/13 02:49 AM)

#402375 - 07/02/12 06:30 PM Re: False memory? [Re: ahyden]
dead_inside Offline

Registered: 07/02/12
Posts: 1
Loc: Toronto, Ontario
I turn 50 this year and have been seeing a therapist for 2 years, for other reasons. I am in an LTR, own a home and have a decent job. This year I started getting flashbacks. Not complete scenes, just snips. I was recently released from the hospital after making an attempt on my life. I am currently on Citalopram for depression. My life is collapsing around me and I am currently on sick leave with 12 weeks of group therapy ahead of me. If I look up the adult symptoms of child sexual abuse, I can check off most of them. If I review some of my life experiences, there were some happy times, but for the most part I didn't seem to feel anything. I honestly don't know if I ever experienced love or if I will feel it at all anymore. I am more like a robot. I go through the motions (hugs, thank you, your welcome...etc) but feel nothing. I have objectified women most of my life and after the sex died down, I dumped them or they dumped me. Can anyone else relate to this? Your experiences?

#402379 - 07/02/12 06:40 PM Re: False memory? [Re: ahyden]
scottyg Offline

Registered: 06/26/12
Posts: 289
Loc: Seattle
Hang in there man. I HATE shrinks, too. My story Echoes from '79 is quite different than your own but the takeaway is the same: The professionals who're supposed to be "helping" often don't know what the hell they're doing and this ends up doing more harm than good.

It's hard to do, exhausting really, but you got to shop it around. I am recently returning to therapy after a 30 year break from the absolute quacks I saw as a child and I am auditioning my 3rd therapist this Friday. The first guy was so creepy and weird a never went back, the second guy was ok but after like 6 months of not really getting anywhere productive I called it quits and now I'm going to see a guy who was listed on this site. He's been a facilitator here so he seems pretty legit. Check out the mental health resources link on the main page of Male Survivor for referrals.

Again, I hate, hate, hate the profession because so many of them have fucked me over (figuratively). "Yes! More drugs are always the answer!" No, I need someone who's not a quack to help me. I don't like the process but for me the alienated, highly self-destructive alternative is worse. Stay here and stay strong ahyden. You'll get through.

#402417 - 07/03/12 01:35 AM Re: False memory? [Re: ahyden]
traveler Offline

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 4197
Loc: resettling in NE Ohio
ahyden -

so sorry you were not believed and devalued/disrespected in that way. sometimes that feels like another violation or abuse.

you will always be taken seriously here. who would want to make this stuff up? we believe in you - not just what happened to you and you r story - but also your ability - with help - to make a comeback.

don't give up,
How long, LORD, must I call for help, but you do not listen?
Or cry out to you, “Violence!” but you do not save?
Why do you make me look at injustice?
Why do you tolerate wrongdoing?...
Therefore the law is paralyzed, and justice never prevails....
Habakkuk 1:2-3

#402443 - 07/03/12 08:24 AM Re: False memory? [Re: ahyden]
Blessedcurse Offline

Registered: 06/05/12
Posts: 98
I can't believe why people still listen to these "false memory" people when there is so much proof that traumatic events really can be repressed and then reocurr in memory when the victim is ready to deal with it. Makes me so angry. To me this is just as bad as the people denying holocaust, only the "false memory"-people get lots of respect, getting the "controversial"-label on every article about repressed memories.

It's not controversial that memories can be repressed! It has been prooven many many times. Some years ago there was a child porn scandal in my country and when the abused children were shown the films of themselves being abused (in the trial) they still denied it happended. Even though there was proof the children said it wasn't them or they just started to talk about something else. This is just one example.

I find it horrible that a therapist would say to you that your memories are false. I hope you find a better one!

#402448 - 07/03/12 12:51 PM Re: False memory? [Re: Blessedcurse]
ahyden Offline

Registered: 05/22/12
Posts: 21
Thanks all, I feel supported and believed here. I was just so frustrated by the experience and needed to share. Strange thing is I didn't get angry when it happened but afterwards when I thought about it.

Others here recommended me to interview the psychologist before I decide which one I just find it really difficult since I get very anxious in social situations but I guess I really have to try. I'm going to leave this one and try to find another.

Thanks all

#402449 - 07/03/12 12:58 PM Re: False memory? [Re: ahyden]
ahyden Offline

Registered: 05/22/12
Posts: 21
I didn't really know about this false memory syndrome thing... maybe it is possible that can happen, but I know that my memories are real and it explains all the pain and problems I've had since I can first remember. The psychologist have theories but do they know what it's like to be so hurt? The word hurt doesn't come anywhere close to the real meaning.. there are no words. I guess what I really need is a human being who can relate... so I'm grateful to be here, because this is the only place I've found where people really get it.

#402450 - 07/03/12 01:06 PM Re: False memory? [Re: dead_inside]
ahyden Offline

Registered: 05/22/12
Posts: 21

Yeah I can relate to this. I'm younger but I recognize a lot of what you say. I also have flashbacks, I think for me they are the worst of it all.

I think I'm realizing that what I went through is too big to carry for one person. That is why it had to be repressed so I could survive. Now it's coming back to me I need other people. Maybe it's not like that for everyone but that is what I'm realizing now for myself. I can only carry it with the support of other people and that is what I'm focusing on now, to find support.

I hope your therapy will help you and that you get through this. There are other people on this site who has gone through it and healed so I try to think of them to see that it is possible.

Edited by ahyden (07/03/12 01:07 PM)

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