You are absolutely right, of course. It is a little presumptuous of me to write about it like I know your therapist. You're there. You know best.
I haven't had a therapist like you describe for quite a while and have been fortunate in having people work with me that have extensive experience with childhood abuse and abuse recovery. That undoubtedly makes a lot of difference.
You shouldn't be put in a position where you have to educate a therapist about what he/she should know already if they are working in that field.
What I was thinking about was my new found ability to give more honest feedback about therapist suggestions and direction than before.
I was a real people pleaser and reluctant to say anything but what I thought they wanted me to say. Didn't want to disappoint anyone.
Its been nice not to settle for things as they are first presented to me. I've successfully argued with my insurance company about coverage and with my employer about job expectations. This happened because I enlisted support and clearly told them that they were wrong.
That, I see now, doesn't quite apply to your situation but I do think it is all right, if you feel you want to, to hold her accountable for what sounds like incompetence.
I wouldn't call the scenes in the movie graphic. They don't rise (or descend) to the level of “smut” which is graphic, I think. They are gratuitous though, I think, unnecessary to the plot, titillating and pandering to core audience interests. More or less they are just to sell tickets in my opinion.
Your therapist was wrong not to have been aware of the fact that the movie's content might be a problem for you and is wrong now, having learned of your negative experience, not to apologize and re-focus her therapeutic approach to your needs.
I went through practically a dozen therapists over a period of years before finding a good fit. I wish it was easier but advocacy for mental health clients is sorely missing in most healthcare systems. Those clients which most need to be advocated for are often most overlooked.
Sometimes, things just won't work the way we want them to.