I was a junior staffer, only 17 years old. I still remember his "Face". Face was my bosses - boss, but he took upon himself to manage me and a few others directly. It was cold and my bag warm, I was tired from play and work, and all this made for perfect conditions for my very deep sleep. I remember trying to figure out why the zipper of my sleeping bag would always come undone. I also remember trying to figure out why my blanket would become bunched up on the zipper side. I remember intentionally causing the zipper to become jammed so that it would not come undone, but sometimes it still would. I would normally fold my blanket over so the fold was on the zipper side and keep me warmer. A lot of good that does once he pulls it out to get access to me.

"Face" was the camp director and for about 10 weeks he had access to any of us. I wonder if he abused every one of us, or just most of us. Did he keep to the staffers as he ran an entire camp full of kids? I have no idea how often, or how many times “Face” abused me because I slept through it.

My dreams would become nightmares and whatever I was dreaming about would become sexual when I was being molested. I remember one of these nightmares clearly and many more vaguely. Because I would often dream of the camp and the scouts there I began to wonder about my sexuality. I remember on one occasion felling a release but not finding any cum the next morning. It “seemed” that my blanket would bunch up toward the zipper side a lot. I would intentionally jam my zipper to keep it from coming undone but it would still happen. I awoke in the night many times cold. My bag would become unzipped, my blanket would slide out.

I caught Face atempting to molest Victim 4 on one occasion but was unaware of what was happening because I was a sheltered naive Mormon kid who already had suppressed memory of prior abuse. I caught the perpetrator molesting me on two occasions. I also have many more times I saw signs or had memories that would lead to me beive that I was abused. I have 3 times I remember specifically that I have a lot reason to believe I was abused after he worked me to make me extra tired. For many I have specific details, and many more times the zipper was undone and I suspect.

When I caught Face molesting victim 4, I believed the perpetrators lies about what I had seen. I spoke with Face on this occasion and can identify him now that I don’t believe his lies. I could not identify him the first time I caught him. I was way to traumatized, I actually thought he was some kind of demon sent from hell to punish me for what I had dreamed. The second time. I could only work it down to either the camp director or water front director based on body build. I was fairly sure it was the camp director. It was too traumatic to cope with.

I only deduced what happened after catching him twice and was not aware for long before everything became suppressed. The difference between the bag becoming unzipped and the bunched up blanket was because some times when he was done molesting he would zip me up and some times he would not. It must have been hard to get the blanket back in all the way or something. The result however was the same, I would not sleep good. These cold nights escalated dramatically after victim 4 left the camp. I was unaware of what was happening to me, even after I caught him the first time.

It took catching him I the middle of the act and grabbing his hand before I was aware I was being abused…. By then I have no idea how many times I had already been abused ->2-3 times a week at least for about 7 weeks, because of my f-ed up coping I returned for another 2 weeks. He worked there three years, during my year I know of 6 victims at least. A few of the victims came forward and put him in jail. It was a high publicity case.

I hope he is still in jail and if not I hope to put him back in jail, but I know that serial rapist only normally get life if the victims are adults. And while I don’t yet know the result of my own perpetrator, I know that the camp director that replaced him also molested kids.

And the results of that : if you rape a scout multiple times you only get One Year in Jail…

Our system is so backwards.
�Your only limit within reason, is the one that you set up in your own mind.� Napoleon Hill, The Law of Success, 1925.