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#396337 - 05/07/12 12:06 AM Re: Talk To My Son, Please [Re: unwritten]
Sailor John Offline

Registered: 10/04/11
Posts: 310
Loc: Newfoundland & Labrador
To Your Son,

All the symptoms you exhibit are classics for sexual abuse. I only realized recently was that because I was abused by my "father" and male priests, I detest going to male doctors and dentists. This has caused me some medical problems and lots of dental problems.

I was abused just after I turned 14. Unfortunately, I kept all this under wraps for over 40 yrs before I got help. Like most guys from my generaton, the shame, fear of being humiliated and the fact that the cops wouldn't believe anybody but the priests back then and I "had" to put it away way back in my brain to be "lost forever." Unfortunately for me forever is a long time.

Son, I can only stress to you is that the earlier you start counselling, the better off you will be in the long run. You'll be able to live life as YOU want without the influence of the abuse whether it be college, university or anything else you want to do. As a BIG bonus, it's a lot easier for YOU to get it taken care of it while YOU are young.

You've already told your Mom and counsellor that you were abused as well as having the perp confirm what happened. Now it's just a matter of time until YOU agree what happened was abuse. Abuse can be very insiduous, it definatly does NOT have to be violent. Telling somebody is a major event for you and the first step to being a survivor.

Only when I accidentally saw a female doctor and later went to a female dentist, was I comfortable visiting a doctor or a dentist. 2 and 2 = fear of male authority figures caused by sexual abuse. Even with insurance coverage, the deductible was well into the $1,000.00 range.

Is it possible you also have a phobia about talking to counsellors of whatever sex you're seeing now but would be more comfortable talking with a counsellor of the other sex?
I will mourn the teenager I never was and strive to make that dot of light way out in the far reaches of the end of the tunnel turn into a bright sun.


#396445 - 05/07/12 09:53 PM Re: Talk To My Son, Please [Re: unwritten]
Jim1104 Offline

Registered: 03/17/11
Posts: 410
Loc: Louisiana, USA
Good post Anomolous.

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