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#392505 - 04/06/12 07:53 PM Finding a therapist
desertmouse Offline

Registered: 02/10/11
Posts: 9
Hello everybody,
I'm the spouse of a survivor. We've been married 18 years, and things have not been looking good for a looooong time.... He told me at the beginning of 2011 that he had been abused as a teenager - no more details since then. We've been to marriage counseling before I knew he had been abused, but I feel that really nothing changed. Now with the knowledge of the abuse, I feel that we should give therapy another try. So, does anybody know of a good therapist in the Raleigh NC area?
Many thanks!

#392509 - 04/06/12 08:33 PM Re: Finding a therapist [Re: desertmouse]
MarkK Offline

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2653
Loc: Denver, CO
The 'Find Support' section of this site lists one T in the Raleigh area:
Number of WoR's attended: 3
Last attended: 2011

#392516 - 04/06/12 09:30 PM Re: Finding a therapist [Re: MarkK]
desertmouse Offline

Registered: 02/10/11
Posts: 9

I did find that one. I was hoping other survivors/spouses in the RDU area could refer one based on personal experience.

Thanks for your help!

#392518 - 04/06/12 09:38 PM Re: Finding a therapist [Re: desertmouse]
Ken Singer, LCSW Offline

Registered: 08/24/00
Posts: 5781
Loc: Lyons, CO USA
Be sure to check out this article:

A good potential therapist should answer these questions. If you get an attitude, cross that therapist off your list.

Good luck
Blissfully retired after 35 years treating sexual abuse

#392573 - 04/07/12 03:10 AM Re: Finding a therapist [Re: desertmouse]
phoenix321 Offline

Registered: 09/26/11
Posts: 912
Loc: USA, FL

Good places to go are places like Salvation Army Domestic Violence centers and other rape criss centers to see who they recommend. They usually know everybody because they refer rape victims. Some counselors there will talk to male survivors. Your insurance company will tell you they will pay. Out-of-network usually they don't cover. Some won't take insurance today.

Best advice I ever got was write a letter to the therapists you are considering telling them the issue (CSA, etc.) and ask if they have expertise in that area. No point in shelling out $200-300 (or an insurance visit--there's usually a maximum number of visits to shrinks) for a initial consultation if they have no expertise. I found that out after a blew lots of money and they didn't have any expertise. It's how other people with all kinds of issues did I discovered. I was way naive for my own good. Fellow patients got responses and that's who they went to. If I ever go to another shrink, that will be my method to sniff out a good one. If they don't respond, I won't see them.

The MS articles are good too.

Best of luck.

A guy opens the front door and sees a snail on his doorstep. He picks up the snail and throws it across the street in a neighbor's yard. A year later, the guy opens the front door and the same snail is on his doorstep. The snail says, "What the f*ck was that about?"

#392629 - 04/07/12 02:08 PM Re: Finding a therapist [Re: phoenix321]
desertmouse Offline

Registered: 02/10/11
Posts: 9
Thank you all so much!
Phoenix, great idea in calling Domestic Violence centers to see if they have a list of therapists. I'll probably also give our previous counselor a call to see if he can recommend anybody who has experience with male CSA.


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