"When a woman cries, our instinct is to bundle her up in my arms and hold her until she's cried out the hurt she has. When a man cries, our instinct is to run away or freeze, because we feel the man's hurt too deeply to know how to respond.
Women wear their hurts on their sleeves. Men don't. And when it is powerful enough to come flooding into the open especially in the form of tears, you feel it to your core and most people don't know HOW to respond to that."
The above quote is from my little sister, my bulldog Marie. We were discussing this very topic yesterday, and I just thought that this particular comment of hers demonstrated part of the 'phenomena' of tears very well.
Boys are taught not to cry. So in terms of the general bulk of society, when they cry, they are either being 'weak' or else they have SO MUCH hurt built up that many do not have the tools or knowledge of how to respond to it.
I have cried only very VERY rarely in front of people. Sis saw my tears near the end of our assault, and that is the only time in our lives that she has seen me shed actual tears. I don't cry in public if I can help it. I block it down, lock it up, toughen my outer shell.
I cry alone. When no one is there to see.
The truth is, I think, that men cry inside, due to society's conditioning, and I think much of our percepted 'aggressiveness' and 'anger' is actually the response that in a woman would elicit tears.
Just some thoughts of mine. Take them or leave them. And I thought sis' comment was a bit telling.
Adapt. Overcome. Survive.