Well seeing as my parents were the main abusers... but there was still plenty of signs people like my soccer coach and teachers at school should have picked up on. Or the neighbours, when they heard me or my brother screaming, again.
-Unexplained bruises and cuts, even if i got good at making up excuses when I got older. There were to many and to often. My back now looks like people that got tortured in prison or something, covered in scars
-Fixation at food, since we often didnt get feed properly at home, or not at all
-Dirty, illfitting clothes with holes etc
-Parents never coming to even one soccermatch or talk or other official schoolthing.
-Figthing not to fall asleep at school after another sleepless night at home or at the streets.
-Hanging around outside around midnight and later at the age of 7 or 8.
-Moodchanges, i could be the classclown one second but then when someone sneaked up on me or touched my shoulder unexpectedly i could get really mad or jumpy
-Drawings, sometimes my drawings were way to dark for a 6 year old
-Staying home from school 'sick' atleast once a month or every other month
-Extreme fear of having to undress for gym in the presence of other kids
-Not having gym clothes, or food for playtime in elementary school, not having anything to give the kids at school when it was my bday, not getting presents at my bday or sinterklaas (wich is like a dutch santaclaus).
-Refusing to sit at Sinterklaas's lap (because i was sure if he looked me up in his book he would find out what a bad boy i really was)
-Drastic changes in schoolwork, i was a smart kid but my work went from top of the class to bottom of the class atleast a couple of times each year.
-when asked in group 3 (6 and 7 year olds) what kind of job your parents had i explained 'my father drinks beer in his tvchair'.
-Beating up kids pretty badly when they treathened my younger brother, i was extremely protective of him, yet could not always protect him from my parents though..
-From time to time being unable to sit on my chair for a long time without standing up when the teacher wasnt looking or fidgeting
-In group 3 when asked what certain things are used for, i piped in and said belts are for beating bad kids, out of the blue
-having a kid pointing out my underwear was bloody when changing for gym, when a teacher was within hearingdistance
-Missing soccer trainings and matches all the time even though i was probably the most fanatic and enthousiastic player he had
-My dad chasing me with his belt when i ran out of the house i was about 6 years old, then dragging me back in when he catched me. That was when he was on occasion still faster then me. Didnt take long before he couldnt catch up with me anymore but he was still stronger and i knew that i had to come home eventually anyway..And then punishment would be even more severe.
-and probably the biggest one, i offered to give my group 4 teacher a blowjob if he wouldnt call my parents about my schoolwork and not participating in class. He refused..Not sure what he then said or did but like a few days after that we moved and i got beaten up so badly at home i can almost still feel it. I was 7 years old at the time.
Broken eyed and shutdown
Running down the road
Send me straight to hell
Watch me burn, watch me burn