I just had the most incredible experience with a fellow MS in my city. A guy that has NEVER been able to win, never had someone fight for him or see he has the heart of a champion in the shell of what should be a broken man. No hyperboly for realz.
Background. he (D) was one of 6 kids, 5 diff dads, mother alcoholic, and bipolar. Dad never in his life. Mom needed booze money so he was SOLD to his perp at age 11. Tried to get away at 18 and went to police. Went to trial but the perp threatened his life ( another witness disappeared another broken back in a wheelchair). So this guy says in court "no" I guess i dreamt it. With each "no" to the charges ripping his heart out in fear and life sucking shame for knowing what a spineless waste of space he was. Did not get away til the perp died, when D was 28.
Now at 44 his daughters say that their older step brother is trying to coerce them into smoking pot and drinking booze. He is 20 the girls 11 and 14. The youngest is nearly suicidal, cutting herself and the oldest withdrawing. Social services says unless he protects his kids. He is just as culpable as the Ex . Who when the girls said their older brother is doing this and hitting them too, does NOTHING.
So he fights for his kids as the school principle, counsellor and social worker say he must or he could lose them. He is denied legal aid, denied funding for the girls, denied access to the court laywers, denied request for help having witnesses.
I helped him get as much evidence as possible, encouragement and moral support. He goes to court, against the Ex and her lawyer. He sticks to his guns and when she attacks him like always instead of folding he puts up his collar and acts like a man withstanding the buffeting of the storm with each forward step. The judge asks for the response to the Ex and D stays calm, says " I am only cuz i need to protect my daughters" . Stay unflapped. 6 hours in court 3 delays and recesses.
The judge grants D , full responsibility for the kids, the ex loses the benefits, his daughters are now safe. HE DID IT.
He IS the heart of a lion , when he could so easily be the empty bitter shell of a frightened frozen boy. THe first time EVER, he has won! His daughters see, he is their champion.
THis is what we give each other here, the small glimmer to see we can do so much more than we could have ever imagined. Soon the glimmer grows and we can see ourselves for the first time for what we really can become. MEN Standing and moving forward when it would be so easy to turtle. BEING KNOCKED DOWN IS NOT LOSING, STAYING DOWN IS. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bh7AsIZRMw
Could be one of my best days ever.