I agree with George. Tell your husband's t that you've reconsidered the offer and when you get there, you can ask away. If your husband has set limits with the therapist, you can either challenge them or ask why they are there.

I like to meet the partners of my clients with their permission. Some will set limits on the conversation, such as acting out behaviors, and I will respect them. It might be a little uncomfortable, but I want the client to feel confident that I will not violate his boundaries.

Blissfully retired after 35 years treating sexual abuse