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#369265 - 09/02/11 03:41 AM Yep, it is by women, for women, but also for me
SamV Offline

Registered: 12/13/09
Posts: 5972
Loc: Sunnny, South East USA

What I learned here was what I need to Keep going in recovery, and what I should look for in my own behavior.

Please, go here to take control of your recovery.


MaleSurvivor Moderator Emeritus 2012 - 2014

#369543 - 09/06/11 01:42 AM Re: Yep, it is by women, for women, but also for me [Re: SamV]
SamV Offline

Registered: 12/13/09
Posts: 5972
Loc: Sunnny, South East USA
My notes from the webinar;

Addiction beliefs
"It's my fault."
"I am a failure."
"I am unlovable."
"I can't trust anyone."
"There's no hope for me."
"Nothing will ever change."
"I don't deserve anything."
"God has abandonned me."
"I am alone."
"I am different."
"I am better off dead."

These beliefs are lies, false and keep sufferers stuck in the coping mechanisms

Isolation, physical emotional social and spiritual
Shame perpetuates the cycle and secrecy of the disease, the oppposite is being with a group
Unidentified, unhealed trauma 28 day treatments or outpatient is not effective if they have not addressed core issues
Unidentified, untreated co-occuring disorders or trauma
Limited access to addiction treatment providers
Limited community or family support


Intense, painful expreiences that overwhelm our ability to cope witht he thoughts, sensations and feelings that result
Must be considered in the context of each individual's experience
Big "T" trauma; discrete, identifiable, physical, sexual, rape, major injury, unexpected death, witnessing violence, war, physical neglect
Small "t" trauma; non empathic invalidating care givers inconsistent repsonses tfrom caregivers, neglect, bullied, teased, emotional or verbal abuse, alcohol in family

Co Occuring drama
Addictive behavior developes in trauma survivors
control moods affect regulation
fill a hole in the soul, lonely, disconnectedness
to medicate the truth, somatic pain, body memory
Trust inanimate support, over human support, alcohol over friend or family member

Defining recovery
Hope, Sobriety dedicating myself to recovery, to take care of body mind and soul
Recovery is;
avoiding coping mechanisms and other toxins and eating nutritious foods to fuel my body in a healthy way
Actively censoring my thoughts and effectively practising new coping skills to manage stress and relieve anxiety
For my soul, being truly happy. I make decisions that are consistent with my morals, and values, and I take full responsibilty for my actions, I nurture a persoanl relationship with Jehovah.

How Do I know/guage recovery?
To the extent I do/feel these things;
Honesty- we all have blind spots
Open mindedness(to believe recovery is possible, to believe I am worth the help)
Willingness(to beleive, to trust, to try new behaviors(meeting, medication, Kingdom Hall, willingness attached to action), to listen to supportive people)
Connectedness(to others in recovery, family and friends, to Jehovah(first), to self)
True happiness, joy and freedom

Recovery is NOT about fighting urges, stopping or controlling, but it means SHOWING up, in our lives, in our world, in the lives of our friends and family.

Professional treatment- outpatient(once a week), intensive outpatient(three times a week, day treatment(three to five days a week), transitional living(lives with a recovery oriented environment), residential and inpatient(full, lng term)
Medical; detox, trweating co-morbid, addictions impair our physical bodies, liver, heart, brain, all of these need to be assesed and treat, Psychiatric evaluation, medication management for cravings,
Education for patient, family

Professional treatment
Individual, group and family therapy
12 Step
Expressive therapy especially with co-occuring drama(art, adventure, dance, ropes courses)

Practical Recovery tools
Desperation can be a gift
Community support groups, DailyStrength, MS
12 Step meetings, Aa Na Oa Alanon, Ea, Coda,
Nami(Natinal assocaition for the menatally ill), Dbsa Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance)
Literature, educational(how it affects us), inspirational recovery stories
SAM: Service(self esteem, self worth): volunteering, speaking(self-testimmony), sharing your story(valuable unique with other's who have been in the same places I have been)
Writing Journaling
Phone calls, texts, emails, Stay Connected
Prayer, meditaiton, religion
Healthy Eating, exercise, good sleep habits
Sober fun, leisure activities

12 Signs of Spiritual Awakening
An increase in letting things happen rather than making them happen
Frequent smiling attacks
Feelings of being connected with others, and nature
Frequent overwhelming episodes of appreciation
A tendency to think/act spontaneously rahter than from fears based on past experiences
An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment
A loss of ability to worry
A loss of interest in conflict
A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others
A loss of interest in judging others
A loss of interest in judging oneself
Gaining the ability to love without expecting anyhting in return



Getting over food addiction easier? Alcoholics need to drink, just not alcohol, so too with food, stay away from foods I am addicted to, food behaviors are with me allways, SUpport and help!
Try not to relapse? Support and Help, lots of it!
Get connected to a support group, build a circle of friends, get connected, consistently to feel the connection for 6 months!

Keep persisting, don't give up.

I did not feel real love for anyone, little t trauma, disconnected from love. Barrier feeling feelings is medication that dissociate feelings.

PTSD and misconstruing intentions; hang onto supoprt from elders, trauma distorts lens we se the lens through, be open to the thoughts I am wrong about perceptions, do I judge myself for having issues, past adn present, and then let them go, self judgement

Depression and chronic grief, it could be both, very similar,

Chronic depression and BPD, Nami, DBAS(?) and dialectical behavior therapy

MaleSurvivor Moderator Emeritus 2012 - 2014


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