I have known my fiance for 5 and a half years (we are both 21 yo). He has always told me that he has done horrible things, but would never tell me what these things were. I was finally able to get it out of him.
He told me that when he was 7-years-old he raped his mother. He was a weak child and no more than 3.5 feet tall and she was in the Navy; I just don't believe that he could have forcibly restrained and raped her. Later that night he told me she "gave in" to this so-called rape and let him do this.
I think that she molested him, and that he is confused and feels angry with himself for something he never had control in doing. I myself am a rape victim and I know how easy it is to blame yourself for these things. But, is it possible that a boy can think he raped his mother and believe he is an abomination to the human race, when in fact it was her doing?
Also, he has "forgiven" himself for what he thinks he did. But can I forgive his mother for letting this trauma happen to him? Are you ever able to forgive something like that?
I am angry, for obvious reasons. At both his mother for having this happen and his father for not being there to stop it (he abandoned him for 2 years on a drug binge after this happened; I only wonder if he left because of this). We will be going to couples counseling to conquer both of our traumas, but I would appreciate any advice from those who have actually been through an experience like this.